Insecurities, Pt. 1

You might see a smile on my face
You might think my mind's in a good place
What if I told you that's a facade, a mirage
Nothing more than a straight lie, most of the time
My self-confidence feels non-existent
Sorry to my friends if I've been feeling distant
It's not intentional, just something I cannot control
It's not a scrape but it's a hole dug
Saw deep through my soul

I don't know why I'm feeling this way
Accidentally pushing people away
Sometimes it's one of those days
Where I just sit up and lay

And thinking about all my past mistakes
And point out the things I don't like about me
A lot of my problems are superficial
They seem big when they are really little
Make things hard when they could be simple
I know my mind said it's not beneficial

I can't help it, I don't like my nose
I can't help it, I don't like my skin
I can't help it that my acne shows
I can't help it, my eyebrows are thin
Just some reasons why
Why I am so shy
And please don't think I don't like you
'Cause I don't say "Hi"
People say "Hey" and I just keep on walking
Going to parties but never start talking
Please don't mistake it for hostility
Influenced by my insecurities
My insecurities