So Exciting! (The Pitch Song)

Oh, the story! Ah! Yes, uh

There'll be
Lovers

And singers

And entrepreneurs

Depravity

Ecstasy

And love that endures

Worthy of even the best rock on tour
A tale in the shadows of dear sacré-coeur
We! See!
Along the seine
Upon it's filthy shore
The bloated corpses of those
Killed the night before

But it's a family show
With art both high and low

A tale of love

And death

And sex

And money

Dancing and away we go

Sweet satine
Who plays our ingenue
A sparrow singing up and
Down each avenue

She wears a thin black dress
And tells a tale of woe
Of pain and loneliness

But that's not all, as these things go!
She's rather sick
With some obscure malaise
No doubt a crueler trick from
Wilder desperate days

But one day
Singing through her pain
The song kicks out the rain
And there he stands
A lover

Yes
One day, everything changes
When she meets a man

A man
Unlike any she has known
He's uh

A ventriloquist

No! He's a matador
Striding across the sands of destiny

No no no
He's a sailor

Yes! A sailor! That's it
A man who has spent his life voyaging across the turbulent seas

He's been searching for a mate
And now it seems like fate
A gift from God above

A love divine forevermore
Their bodies intertwined

But fate has many other things in store

There's a man who already claims her
An evil gangster who runs this town

She's unhappy and no one blames her
The most lascivious racketeer around

He buys her love

He buys her clothes

He's rough but this is all the poor girl knows

He buys her love

There's no escape
But now a triangle has taken shape

And so the sailor, driven mad
Determined to unseat this cad
Swears to risk his life for love
And there's our show
All of the above

A spectacle of savagery

A testament to lunacy

Fun for the whole family

And all of it designed by me

So exciting

The audience will stomp and cheer

So delighting

It will run for fifty years

So exciting

Make them laugh or make them cry

So delighting

And in the end should someone die?

So exciting

Make our dream reality

So delighting

Make it happen just for me

Make it happen just for me