Torture Chairs

Sitting in the brick and mortar
Waiting for the torture chair
Scoping out the clients
The enemies are everywhere
Man, I really, really, hate these trips
Flicks of the wrist make me lose my grip
So, twenty minutes after the appointed time
They take me to a room to be primed
Next room sounds like a fucking construction site
I lay my head down thinking, man, oh fuck my life
Open wide please, let's see them pearly whites
I'll just grab my drill and my various torture devices
And I say

Please, please, please, can I stay home
I really, really, really, don't want to go
Every few months when I get that call
I think to myself, prepare for assault

Umm, we're super super sorry Sir
But we think you got a cavity
It's due to your sucrose depravity
Have you been flossing every night
Do you brush twice a day
Don't you know this might cause gingivitis
And tooth decay
Yes, I've been following all orders
No matter what I do, I hear you're going to be tortured
That's all I hear when your words enter my brain
I cannot contain the pain that I feel
I think I'm at my limit, I cannot grin an bear it
But I still set up an appointment to open wide
And have them repair it
And I say

Please, please, please, can't I stay home
I really, really, really, really don't want to go
Every few months when I get that call
I think to myself prepare for assault