Close to Lose

Here we go again with the problems
I let them stack and do nothing about 'em
Complain when I fall back and I lose my temper
Forget about them 'til I'm feelin' a whole lot better

They disappear for the moment I don't think
Then the night sways until it's come back to sink
Bottling up like feelings are another language
When you don't understand them, it's pretty anxious

How can I solve something I can't fix?
To be stronger about certain things I have to risk
Some healings in the mix, difficult to process this
It's the gist that I miss, understanding differences

I never wanted to choose anger but it chose me
My patience has become so thin, it's grown weak
The heart on my sleeve isn't just showin'
But it's covered in so deep

I just have to let it go, let it go, let it go
If I don't, I could lose all of this and myself too

Another day with a different problem
I just need a moment so I don't bottle 'em
Just 'cause I carry it well, doesn't mean it's not heavy
I thought I was born ready, look where it's just lead me

A whole lotta expectation
Complications that didn't make it for greatness
I'm shaking 'cause I can't take it, it's anger awaking
The ugly consequences that I'm facin', ah

Undeniably, I do nothing but lash out
I exploded with bitter words from my mouth
Like sayin' things that aren't meant to be said
But then again losing my worth for things I shouldn't dread

How do I control my emotions that's burstin'
Into the same feelings we try to protect from hurtin'?
The biggest risk is the joy that I keep on desertin'
I'm imperfectly perfect with burdens

I just have to let it go, let it go, let it go
If I don't, I could lose all of this and myself too