The State Of The End Of The Millenium Address

Neighbours, nobody loves you like we do.
Neighbors, your government has triumphed in finally making you a public fit
for the 21st century.
Never before has a governing body shown so much concern for the economic
well-being of its subjects.
Today we have insulated you from countless factions who threathens your
financial viability; such as the poor; the idealistic foreigners still
clinging to their childish notions of social welfare; why, you're even kept
uninformed of useless propagandist journalism that reports alleged
violations of human rights (We all know they wouldn't have been punished if
they hadn't been doing something wrong!). And who better to dispens such
blantently evident factoids but a self-appointed authority like myself?
Acid Rain is a thing of the past... Too many possible causes, too little
signifigance for our modern thinking public, besides industrial
manufacturing is at an all time low anyway, who needs those narrow minded
laborers anyway. Too many mouths to feed, and to many burden on the pay
roll! Who needs 'em? Here in the land of the free-time. Someother ass
back-ward country will give us what we need by exploiting its uneducated
children.
The Internet has expanded our ability to pacify average americans better
than ever by offering fantastical adventures to every corner of the
imagination. Your home office is the window to your world, and the heart of
your social life. Such reclusive behaviour helps clear the roads and public
works from overburden like the lower middle-class and others who depend
shamelessly on their government. Today you are freer than ever to do what
you want, provided you can pay for it!
Remeber, the first word in USA is US
We have arrived neighbours, we are the priviliged elite!