Archer

That turtle looks like my grandnanny!
For Nanny's birthday one year
We had the croquer make her a cake with a frothy mug of beer
And a pack of Virginia slim
cigarettes made out of icing with the words
"Live it up, Nanny!"
I wonder if turtles would eat chocolate turtles

Wouldn't it be awesome if inside that shell
He had a mini fridge filled with shrimp cocktail?
Or maybe, a puffy couch?
A lava lamp?
Or a comfy bed with thousand count sheets
Just like the bedding at the W hotel
Where I stay all the time with Archer
I don't really know what the W stands for
But I think it's maybe women or Westin
I don't know

Things are really crazy since the wedding day
Cause Archer's upstate building the cabin
He's usually out on the yacht
Or writing books
When he's not fighting dragons in space

We just bought an apartment
By Buckingham Palace last year
I love the Eiffel Tower
And the views are so beautiful when it rains
That I take pictures of the lightning
And send them to the weather channel

Arthur really wants three bedrooms in the cabin
Did I just say Arthur?
What I meant was Archer
Yes, Archer
No matter how much I try to tell him no
I let Archer get his way every time
I like popcorn.
A home gym for his workout is non negotiable
Cause Archer's a pro baseball player
So three bedrooms it is



Credits
Writer(s): Jeff Bowen
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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