Hell

hiding behind cigarettes and a bitter smile
when was the last time you felt alive
you shouldn't have to pull out your eyes
to find a better outlook on life

With everything I have I want to hate you
but I can't seem to break the routine
With everything I have I want to hate you
you keep me tied down and I can't ever leave

and I put myself through hell
to look better in the eyes of someone else
I'll be the fuel to your fire and I'll let it burn

so let me fall asleep and don't wake me up
or show me what I've been missing while I've been blinking

So just throw me the rope and I'll hang myself again for the thousandth time
You keep letting it slack and bringing me back when I'm pleading for this to end

and I put myself through hell
to look better in the eyes of someone else
I'm looking up at the clouds
Be my silver lining
let me leave the past behind me
in the dark I see you shining
take all this hate from inside me
just be my silver lining

let me leave the past behind
in the dark I can see you
take all this hate from inside
where are you when I need you

and I've been biting my nails for this
dug in my palms clenched into a fist
I should have known I'm too weak to resist
bury me with my ignorance