Jesus Was a Wino

Well, some days you wake up,
Life feels meaningless.
You don't even have
the strength to get up and get dressed.
Then when you do,
you see your clothes are all torn to shreds.
And you can't even afford to buy a needle and thread.
So you might go to church
to bow your head and pray
But that ain't always enough to get it through the day
Sometimes you'll feel bitter
You figure this priest is a mooch
And you might just take all of your tithes
to a bottle of hooch.
And if people knew, they would look down on you
Don't they know that it's true:
Jesus was a wino, too.

Plus, people may ask, "Why have your lips turned black?"
"Hey, what the hell is so funny, man?
Why have your eyes gone slack?"
They're gonna feel high and mightier to you
And I can barely stand
I'll just tell them I couldn't turn down one more glass of the blood of the lamb

Because if people knew, they would call me a fool
I wish they knew it was true
Jesus was a wino, too

And this here six-dollar bottle is just about all that I can afford
And if I can't find a corkscrew
I'll just smash it open right here on the floor
And you might call me crazy
For lapping this off the ground
But a few years ago I would be drinkin' with Jesus right now
'Cause they may not have had Carlo Rossi way back in His day
Jesus had only water but he turned it to wine anyway

And nobody asked, "What would Jesus do?"
'Cause everybody knew
Jesus was a wino too

No, nobody asked, "What would Jesus do?"
'Cause everybody knew
Jesus was a wino too

Oooh, uh huh
Uh huh.