The Bouncer

I was out drinkin' with my buddies
right after work, boots still muddy.
Did a shot then we shot the breeze, shot some pool, like we always do.
Everybody buyin' everybody rounds.
I didn't wanna be rude and turn 'em down.
Buzz on after 2 or 3, or maybe 3 or 4. Didn't count no more 'cuz,
I was just there to drink
I was just minding my own bui-yee-i-isness
Can i get a wi-I-i-I-I-Itness
I was just partyin on, swear I wasn't doin nothin wrong.
Just kissed a waitress on the mouth, then the big bad bouncer threw me out.
Said he played defensive line
for Mississippi back in 1999
He didn't seem that scared of me, when i showed a few, of my karr--até moves (hi-ya)
I'm not sure how far i traveled
Just know i landed face first in the gravel.
Got up and kicked him in the pork-n-beans
Dusted off and then, I ran right back in 'cuz
I was just there to drink
I was just minding my own bui-yee-i-isness
Can i get a wi-I-i-I-I-Itness
I was just partyin on, climbed up on the bar to sing my song,
jumped off and surfed across the crowd, then the big bad bouncer threwme out.
I was just there to drink
I was just minding my own bui-yee-i-isness
Can i get a wi-I-i-I-I-Itness
I was just partyin on, swear I wasn't doin nothin wrong.
Just kissed another waitress on the mouth, jumped off the bar, surfed across crowd,
if i wadn't busy drinkin' woulda taken him down,
but the big bad bouncer threw me out
"He better be glad I was in a good mood"
"Yeah I'll let it slide this time"

then the big bad bouncer threw me out.