Don't Eat The Yellow Snow - Live In Chicago, 1978

(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
Dreamed I was an eskimo
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
Frozen wind began to blow
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
Under my boots 'n around my toe
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
Frost had bit the ground below
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
Was a hundred degrees below zero
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
And my momma cried:
And my momma cried again:
And my momma cried again:
Nanook-a, no, no
Nanook-a, no, no
Don't be a naughty Eskimo-wo-oh
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
(Bop-bop ta-da-da
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)
(Bop-bop ta-da-da)

Save your money: don't go to the show
Well I turned around an' I said: Ho Ho
All together now
Well I turned around an' I said: Ho Ho
One more time,
well I turned around an' I said: Ho Ho
An' the Northern Lites commenced t' glow

Watch out where the huskies go
An' don't you eat that yellow snow
Watch out where the huskies go
An' don't you eat that yellow snow

Well right about that time, people
A fur trapper
Who was strictly from commercial
(Strictly Commershil)
Had the unmedicated audacity
To jump up from behind my igloo
(Peek-a-Boo)
And he started in to whippin' on my fav'rite baby seal
With a lead-filled snow shoe (Tell me the truth)
I said with a lead (lead)
Filled (lead-filled)
With a lead-filled snow shoe (snow shoe)
He said Peak-a-boo (Peak-a-boo)
With a lead (lead)
Filled (lead-filled)
With a lead-filled snow shoe (snow shoe)
He said Peak-a-boo (Peak-a-boo)

He went right up side the head of my favorite baby seal
He hit him on the nose
He hit him on the fin
He hit him on the coccyx
He hit him on the uh, thermidor
He had him right near Managua several times
(About the thorax)
You know what he did to that seal?
He really fucked up my favorite baby seal
Like this
Now folks, that got me just about as evil
As an Eskimo boy can be
And it would you too
So guess what I did (What'd you do then?)
Hey, you'll never guess
I bent down 'n I reached down 'n I scooped down
An' I gathered up a generous mitten full of the deadly
(Yellow snow)
The deadly Yellow Snow from
Right there where the huskies go
An' then I proceeded to rub it all into his beady little eyes
With a vigorous circular motion
Hitherto unknown to the citizens of Chicago
But destined to take the place of the mud shark
In your mythology the vigorous circular motion
Here it goes, rub it!
(Hey)
(Hey)
(Hey)
Alright, now, listen
Some of you people
were here for the last show, right?
Okay, well you know what's gonna happen now, don't you?
This is audience participation time again
Ladies and gentlemen
Now, a lot of the big groups
They have really neat things for the audience to do
Really sophisticated technological things like
"Hey, everybody, get your hands together and let's boogie!"
But, you know, since we're not English or anything
We don't do that, we have things that
Are really stupid for the audience to do
Because the way I've got it figured out
The dumber it is, the more fun it is
so let's get on with it
Here's what you do, everybody stand up
Alright, stand up
Hey, stand up
What're you guys, paraplegics? Stand up!
Alright. Okay, here's what you're gonna do
You're gonna help me demise the fur trapper
This is just. This is just for practice, now watch
Here's what you do

And then you pounced
You pounced again
Jumped up 'n down the chest of the
Great googly-Moogly
You injured the fur trapper

Now, is that sophisticated or what? You know?
Let's, hey. Let's face it, this—what I'm asking you to do
Is really stupid. It's really stupid
However this would do less harm to you than voting
so let's get on with it. One more time

Now you pounced
And you pounced again
You jumped up 'n down the chest of the
Some of you aren't getting the fast part
I think that you're probably
A little bit too ripped for the fast part
We're gonna have to do
Some more work on the fast part
Now, this is really good for you
It's stupid, but it's good for you
Just the fast part, okay? We go
You jumped up'n down the chest of the
You jumped up'n down the chest of the
Jumped up'n down the chest of the
Jumped up'n down the chest of the

Some of you are just standing there twitching
A lot of you girls that don't have brassieres
on it are trying to stand still so
they don't flop up 'n down and hit ya
(Come on!) It won't do
Let it all hang out, guys and girls
Let it flop around. This is the big one. One more time
If you flunk this one
God knows what's gonna happen tonight
All together
I wanna see everybody's buttocks pumping up 'n down this night
Just think of me as an older, more sinister, Jack LaLanne. Ready?

And then I pounced
And I pounced again
And jumped up 'n down the chest of the
Great googly-Moogly
You and me have injured the fur trapper

Sit down!
Alright. It's almost like going to camp
Well, it was at that time that
The fur trapper realized that something was wrong

He looked around
And he looked around
And he looked around
And he kept looking around
And you know what? (What?)
He said, I can't see! (No no no no no, yeah!)
I can't see! (No no no no no, yeah!)
I can't see! (No no no no no, yeah!)
I can't see! (No no no no no, yeah!)

He took a dog-doo sno-cone
An' stuffed it in my right eye
He took a dog-doo sno-cone
An' stuffed it in my other eye
An' the huskie wee-wee
I mean the doggie wee-wee
Has blinded me
Oh, an' I can't see

Well, as you know
It was at this precise moment in time and space
That the evil fur trapper remembered
The ancient Eskimo legend
Wherein it is written (Hey, don't rush me!)
Wherein it is written
On whatever it is that they write it on up there
That if anything bad ever happens to your eyes
As a result of some sort of conflict
With anyone named Nanook
Hey, the only way that you can get it fixed up
Is to go trudgin' across the tundra
Mile after mile
Trudgin' across the tundra
Right down to the parish of Saint Alfonzo
You play this lick, you don't just toss it off
You don't just crank it off, you don't just hurl it out into space
You have to study for oh, moments
Several moments in order to learn this lick
Ed has worked on this lick over and over again
Tonight maybe the (The rats?)
Huh? Oh, oh, yes
And Ed found a rat up in the dressing room
Those of you that were here the last show
We gave you the report that Ed was lonely
And was trying to find a rat to fuck in the dressing room
He found one, it was really good
Worked it over
He ate it and that's why he has the strength to play this part of the show
Are you ready? Take it away, Ed!

That's right, here we are!
At Saint Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
Where I stole the mar-juh-rene
An' widdled on the Bingo Cards in lieu of the latrine
I saw a handsome parish lady
Make her entrance like a queen
Why she was totally chenille
And her old man was a Marine
As she abused a sausage pattie
(Peetie-peetie pattie peetie-peetie pattie pootie)
And said why don't you treat me mean?
(Hurt me, hurt me, hurt me, oh!)
At Saint Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
(Hah! Good God! Get off the bus!)
Where I stole the mar-juh-rene

Saint Alfonzo's Saint Alfonzo's
Saint Alfonzo's Saint Alfonzo's
Get on your feet an' do the funky Alfonzo!

Father Vivian O'Blivion
Resplendent in his frock
Was whipping up the batter
For the pancakes of his flock
He was looking rather bleary
(He forgot to watch the clock)
'Cause the night before behind the door
A leprechaun had stroked (he stroked it)
The night before behind the door
A leprechaun had stroked (he stroked it)
The night before behind the door
A leprechaun had stroked (he stroked it)
Ahhh (stroked his smock)
Set him off in such a frenzy
He sang lock around the crock
An' he topped it off with a
An' he topped it off with a
An' he topped it off with a
Woo woo woo
Woo woo woo
Woo woo woo
As he stumbled on his cock
He was delighted as it stiffened
And ripped right through his sock
Oh, Saint Alfonzo would be proud of me
Proud of me, proud of me

He shouted down the block
(Oh no)
Dominus Vo-bisque 'em
Et come spear a tu-tu
Oh!
Won't you eat my sleazy pancakes
Just for Saintly Alfonzo
They're so light 'n fluffy-white
We'll raise a fortune by tonite
They're so light 'n fluffy-white
We'll raise a fortune by tonite
They're so light 'n fluffy-brown
They're the finest in the town
They're so light 'n fluffy-brown
They're the finest in the town
Good morning, your Highness
Oo-oo-oo
I brought you your snow shoes
Oo-oo-oo
Good morning, your Highness
Oo-oo-oo
I brought you your snow shoes
Ooo-ooo-ooo

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-nanook
Na-na-na-na-na-nanook-oh
Nanook
Rubs it
Saint
Al
Al
Fo-fo-fo
Fo-fo-fo-fo-fo-fonzo

Saint Alfonzo really loves it when he rubs it for him
I have seen him rubbin' it
I have seen him rubbin' it
I have, I have a-seen him stroke his weenie
(It was teenie)
Rub it, rub it, rub it, rub it, rub
Nanook rubs it, Alfie loves it
Nanook rubs it, Alfie loves it
Nanook rubs it, Alfie loves it
Nanook is rubbin' it, and Alfie is lovin' it
Saint Alfonzo, can you hear us praying to you?
Can you fix my Chevy?
Boy, you're really heavy
Here's the church and here's the steeple
Open up and see the people
Some are kneelin', some are standin'
All the money they are handing
To some asshole with a basket
Where it goes we dare not ask it
Nanook rubs it, Alfie loves it
This here basket, really shoves it
Here's your quarter, here's your dollar
Let's play ring around the collar
Hup! Hey, get it now!
(We get it now! We take now your little gifts)

Thank you, thank you
Thank you, thank you
Thank you, thank you
Thank you, thank you friends!

Vince Colaiuta on drums
Arthur Barrow on bass
Tommy Mars on keyboards
Ike Willis on guitar and vocals
Denny Walley on guitar and vocals
Peter Wolf on keyboards
Ed Mann on percussion
Saint Alfonzo rubs it
And uh (of course)
Thanks for coming to the show (Alfie rubs it)
Good night