Hey, Little Minivan

On Deadman's Curve I used to shut 'em down
I had the hottest muscle car in my hometown
I could burn rubber in all four gears
But I haven't done that in a million years

Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the grocery store

She's got an automatic tranny with overdrive
And the radio's tuned to Magic 95
She gets 30 miles on a gallon of gas
And I can schlep all the girls to gymnastics class
She's got her headlights on both night and day
She's the most practical value in the USA
She's got cruise control, ABS and EFI
I keep her Michelins at 32 PSI

Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the children's museum

On icy mornings when I'm feeling my age
I'm protected and warm in my steel cage
Her climate control really pumps out the heat
And her dual air bags just can't be beat
She's rated real high by Consumer Reports
And her two front seats have got lumbar support
I've got the good driver rate and comprehensive insurance
And she's loaded with electronic theft deterrents
Step away from the car, step away from the car
Step away from the car, step away from the car

We're a wild and rowdy bunch when you pass us by
Bobby's buggin' baby sister and makin' her cry
If I have to pull over someone's gonna pay
And it was fun, fun, fun, till Bobby took her teether away
(Fun, fun, fun, fun)

Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the pediatrician

Now the wife and I hardly ever date
'Cause our baby sitter has to be home by 8
We hurry through dinner and go out and park
With the fold-down seats we can nap till dark
I dream of Barracudas and souped-up 'Vettes
Crazy games of chicken and drag race bets
Then she wakes me up and says, "Honey, don't be sad
Our van's the classic Woody you never had"

Now if I ever get tired of my minivan
A red sports car will make me young again

Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the grocery store
What did you do with the last one I gave you?
Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the grocery store
Don't make me come back there
Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the grocery store
If Bobby jumped off a cliff, would you do that, too?
Hey, little minivan, we're goin' to the grocery store
Three kids, what were we thinking?

Go little Minnie Van Gogh
Little Minnie Van Gogh
Little Minnie Van Gogh