Miss Helen (feat. Lauren Osborn)

Out in the desert
On the outskirts of town
Every few years
A carnival comes around
They say that it beckons
'Til one soul comes, then
It takes them and leaves
And they're not seen again

The weeks when our mum
Wouldn't get out of bed
Me and Shira would eat
Chocolate, berries, and bread
The house would be ours
And we'd play make-believe
Pretend father came back
From some kingdom far east

The weeks when our mom
Wouldn't really quite sleep
They were fun and yet scary
Me and Shira agreed
We would build a gazebo
Or repaint the place
But it sat there half-finished
After a few days

And mom would just cackle
And grab us and squeeze
"I try and I try so much more than you see
I wish I was better
I wish I could be
All you need, but there's just one place for me"

"Girls we should go
Where we really belong
To the carnival, sing us a carnival song
I hear it come calling
The sweet music plays
I'll run to the carnival music one day"

By the time we were teens
Mum had long gone away
And every few years
The circus music would play
I did well at school
Got good grades and good friends
I learned laughter could be
Not so scary and tense

But Shira she stayed
In the shadows and then
Never really fit in
Never made lots of friends
At night we would still
Sit together in bed
And she fought feeling manic
And morose in her head

Then one night she cried
And she held me and squeezed
And said "Helen, I try
So much more than you see
I wish I was different
I wish I could be
All you need, but there's just one place for me"

"I know I should go
Where I really belong
To the carnival, sing me a carnival song
I hear it come calling
The sweet music plays
I'll run to the carnival music one day"

I sit out some nights
Talk to Shira as if
She could still hear me
As if she had not left
I tend my affairs
And look after my life
And sit out and eye
The dark desert some nights

I don't know the day
Or the reason just yet
Whether heartbreak or boredom
Or some minor fret
One day the carnival music will play
And I'll go and be with mum and Shira again