Wizard of the Hood

One time, the ICP with this shit for you
And your boys to say "fuck yeah" to
Yo' J, kick some of that shit about the Wizard and all that
Drop a psycho beat and go on and rap, bald-headed fuck

Aw shit homeboy, you should've seen me
I was flipped at the party, drank a fifth of MD
Straight passed out on this mother's bed
Seven cans of brew going through my head
Dreamin', I was sippin' on Faygo
In my dope house and here comes a tornado, huh
I can't run nowhere
'Cause the whole damn house was spinnin' through the air (damn)

And don't laugh just yet
(Your ass land in motherfuckin' Oz) bet
And here comes a three and a half foot pimp
With a blue zoot suit and a mack daddy limp
Yo, I got a grip on my weapon
'Cause this midget motherfucker and his boys are steppin'

(Oh my, look at the witch!)
(You crushed and killed that wicked old bitch)
And they're sayin' that I'm doomed
'Cause I killed some ho that rides on a broom
Fuck this, I'm goin' back to where I stay
And I'm walkin' down the yellow brick alleyway

We're off to see the Wizard
(Sing it high, sing it low)
We're off to see the Wizard
Droppin' motherfuckers all the way to Delray
(Yeah, yeah)
Droppin' motherfuckers all the way to Delray
Well go on, motherfucker

Now I'm roamin' just like a base-head
Everybody know just where the alley led
And don't say you don't know which way to go
Yo, there go the Scarecrow
I ain't playin' this bullshit no more
So I whip out the nickel plated double-four
Best tell my ass how to get back
Or I'ma blow the straw out your fuckin' head

You wanna see the Wizard?
Fuck yeah, I do
Get me off this pole and I'll come with you
You know the Wiz?
Yeah, I used to roll for him
Then he gave me out a G, now I got a bullet for him

Now me and the crow was walkin' on bricks
Spittin' and cussin' and holdin' our dicks
Thinkin' damn, this ain't how the movie go
I ain't seen one mutherfuckin' rainbow
Ain't a fresh pair of kicks in the land, just what you thought
(There go the Tin Man)
How to get to the Wizard?
"What the fuck? I ain't sayin' shit 'til you oil me up"
"I don't see any motherfuckin oil, bro"
"Oil me up with a forty of Red Bull"

Ha, just like the book said
Tin Man was stumblin' like a crackhead
Old ass rusted out metal but we was on our way to see the Wizard of the Ghetto
(Yeah, yeah, yeah)

(Somewhere over the rainbow)
Fuck up, bitch, damn, this ain't Kansas, ho
This is Southwest motherfuckin' Ghetto Zone, bitch
So pick yo' skank ass up and you and Toto get the fuck on

Yeah, we've come a long way
(Drop the motherfuckers all way to Delray)
And I'm a wonderland story book tourist
Grippin' that .44, we comin' up to the forest
Anything could be out there
Lions, tigers, and maybe a bear
(Hoods and hoodlums and thieves, oh my)
(Hoods and hoodlums and thieves, oh my)
(Hoods and hoodloms and thieves, oh my)

I'ma kick somebody in they fuckin' eye
Don't fuck with me at a time like this
I'll send out a bullet, guaranteed won't miss
So I just move and the hooks are flyin'
Then come and buck with the fuckin' lion
I want rings, chains, any kind of gold
Or what?
Or I'ma let this 9 unfold

Man, fuck this, come back to Delray
There you can rob mutherfuckers every day
Crackheads, hoes, whatever you can name
Catch all the rich ones come out the ball game (yeah)
So finally we was at the castle
And with the guards, we got no hassle
They all just got the fuck out our way
I guess even in Oz they know of Violent J

We're off to see the Wizard
(Sing it high, sing it low)
We're off to see the Wizard
Droppin' motherfuckers all the way to Delray
Droppin' motherfuckers all the way to Delray

Yo, where's the motherfuckin' wizard stay?
Who wants to know?
Violent Psychopath J
I want a word with him at gun point
'Cause there's no place like Detroit

Welcome to the Wizard's Kingdom
The Wizard of the Ghetto, as you say
Welcome to the Wizard's Kingdom
Sorry motherfucker, this is where you'll stay
Scarecrow, you ain't shit to me
And the Lion ain't shit but a snack for three
Tin Man, don't take me for a sucker
I'll chew your ass up and spit bullets out, motherfucker

We let it rain
Seventy-nine slugs to his motherfuckin' brain
Then I stepped back, cool and calm
Because the Tin Man was droppin' cluster bombs
Everybody know about car jackin'
So me and the fellas went home mackin'
Jumped in a smooth ass ride
Droptop Geo says "Wiz" on the side

Gripped it back to the hood where we came from
And that shit was fun
Next thing I knew I was back at the party
Got up and was finnin' to tell everybody
But then I just let it pass
'Cause I know they'll laugh at my drunk ass

Droppin' motherfuckers all the way to Delray
Droppin' motherfuckers all the way to Delray

Louder, louder, and louder
Thank you, thank you very much
My next poem is a very short one
Dismay, dismay, oh how there's dismay in May
Thank you, thank you

And now poetry from our friend, 2 Dope
Fuck out of here, man
Is this thing on?
A beautiful butterfly came floating by
And landed on my cheek, just a smidget from my eye
I said to my little friend
Get the fuck off me, bug!
Thank you