Day Two

RADIO: Who is that (who is that)
Emerging from his burrow?
Who can see today what we won't see until tomorrow
Shaman of the shadows, springer of the spring

RADIO - MALE: Springer of the spring, Come on!

RADIO - MALE & FEMALE HOSTS: Is it a squirrel? Is it a beaver?
Kinda both but not quite either

RADIO - MALE: That's right woodchuck-chuckers it's Groundhog Day
We're live from Gobblers Knob talking about everything
Weather

PHIL: Idiots, playing yesterday's tape

RADIO - FEMALE: Totally wacky!

PHIL: There's nothing more depressing than-

RADIO - FEMALE:
I mean what could be crazier than groundhogs in February

RADIO - MALE: By the way, that's a great hat you're wearing

RADIO - FEMALE: Thanks, I made it myself

PHONE: Good morning, this is your wakeup call

PHIL: I didn't set a wakeup c-

PHONE:Happy Groundhog Day!

PHIL:Happy Groundhog- how many days is this holiday?

RADIO - FEMALE: Oh, I'm no good at science

RADIO - MALE: You know,
you lose 80% of your body heat through your head!

PHIL: Bla bla bla bla-bla-bla-bla-blah, you're so fired

RADIO - FEMALE:Punxatawny High!

RADIO - FEMALE & MALE: Gooooo Chucks!

PHIL (MOCKINGLY): Go Penn Staate!

RADIO - FEMALE: I'm still hungover

PHIL:God-damn amateurs

RADIO - MALE: And now the question on everyone's lips-

RADIO - FEMALE [& PHIL]: Chapped lips!

RADIO - MALE: Do you think Phil will see his shadow?

PHIL: Yes he did

RADIO - MALE: What's your prediction?

PHIL: I predict your unmployment
There's nothing more depressing than small towns... tiny minds...

RADIO -???: *Squeaky noise*

PHIL: I'll tell Larry to take the 210 via Bayer and Keystone lake
If we hurry, I'll be drinking decent coffee by 9 or even half past 8
And never again will I wake in the morning in Puuuuunx-

Punxatawney!

Ba-da-bap-bap-ba-da-

PHIL: Suck my balls I'm out!

Punxatawney, Pennsylvania, USA!

PHIL: Okay
One I'm still sleeping and this, I'm just dreaming it
Two it's a prank and everyone's in on it
Three it's a flashback from when I was twenty and ate magic mushrooms
And thought I was *Aquaman*

Four it's some kind of reality show about
Forecasters, bad bed-and-breakfasts, and, snow
Five I've had a stroke and lost my
Memory of the year since last Groundhog Day

Come on Phil wake up, get it together,
It must be the weather it must be the stress!
I just need a moment I just need a rest!

Punxsutawney,
It's a little town with a heart as big as any town, as any small town
In the USA and there is no town greater
Than Punxsutawney on Groundhog, Groundhog, Groundhog

Who is that (who is that?)
Emerging from his burrow
Who can see today what we won't see until tomorrow
Shaman of the shadows, springer of the spring
Is it a squirrel? Is it a beaver?

PRESIDENT OF THE INNER CIRCLE: Kinda both but not quite either

All the meteorologists the world has ever known
Cannot match this little guy's uncanny skill
We can guess but we won't know if we should dress for sun or snow
Until we hear it from old Punxsutawney Phil

PHIL:I'm going back to bed!

RITA: February second, first remote broadcast
GHD in Punx, PA
Working with Phil Connors
They all told me he would be an asshole ... and he is
I mean, he acts kinda asshole-ish, still
I think he might be... mentally ill

Tomorrow spring will come (spring will come)
There will be blue skies my friend
Bright eyes and laughter
Tomorrow there will be sun (there will be sun)
But if not tomorrow perhaps the day after

RITA: Unexpected weather
Seems we're staying here for another night
Which is, kind of fine