Don't Tell Me I'm Pretty

I keep my limbs in this pile
I hoard excuses in stacks until they flatten cats
And I've been tuning the dials on my pillowcase
Trying to fast forward to the good part
Wait for the twist, miss all the good parts
To end my day early, preferably before it starts,
I just put whatever in my blood

They said you can't get addicted to pot
I must've forgot
My short term memory's not good
You can't get addicted to pot
Well, why not?
Don't tell me what I can't do

Then I brought home some free weights,
Like hanging posters in a cage
Just taking up space
I give myself too much leeway
Except in my head and my health
And how I talk to myself

Turns out that bud don't got all that much to do with Buddhism
But sometimes I like to pretend, and I get pretty zen
And I try a guided meditation on self-compassion

They said to pick something to love
Didn't matter what it was
Didn't matter if you're even good at it
Just pick something to love
"What's so great about drugs?"
What's so great about anything?
And they said you can't get addicted to pot
Probably not
I don't wanna argue right now
I just want something to love more than myself
Even when that's not a high standard

Every day is a day God dropped,
Held up to Himself and He picked the hairs off
Like, "It's still good, you can help yourself!
And if you want help, you can help yourself!"
I never learned how to help myself
So I'm refusing the call, I'll pace the equator
And I don't get service there, I'll talk to you later
I'm tumbling down the up escalator
Then I will try to find and realign my spine
Too little, too late this time
See you never

I just want something to love more than myself
Even when that's not a high standard