Dear Mom

I don't think that I can lie
I think I'm running out of time
I think that I'm finally losing my mind
Cause I can't stop sitting here doing my lines
My momma said 'boy, you must be out of your mind', yeah
'I see you in here on your grind', but
'You only get older in time to go backwards
So it drops what you should go find', yeah
'But mom, my anxiety is finally getting better'
And she said that's fine, but
'I can't have you here taking up space
Like your dad did when you was 9', yeah
'But mom please just give me some time', I
Swear to God we gonna be fine
Swear to God one day I'll buy you a car
And myself, the best house I can find, I
Swear to God I'll prove them wrong
I know you believe in me, so I'll prove you right, just
Don't ever forget that I'll never give up
Even though this ain't what you like, yeah

But there's nothing else for me out there
I'll make it or I'm going down there
The cloud that hung over my head
It don't run out of rain and now it put around there
I swear to God I can not stop and I'll never be finished
Until this whole goddamn city diminished
Until I stand up and say that I made it
And tell my mom I have a reason for living
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
And mom, see, I know there's tons on your mind, yeah
You seem to forget about mine, yeah
I'll admit, I don't want to talk about them
I'd rather look at pictures of Violet
But mom, I just need to confide, and
Say what's up here on my mind, and
Tell you about all the shit that's been going on
Please can you just give me five, yeah
Sorted out, now the girl I love is back here, yeah
And I think she gonna stay in my life, yeah
It's hard cause I love her so much
But it's rough at the moment
I can't her mine, yeah
And plus, I'm in love with her mindset
It's crazy cause she's doing so much better than me
Like, 'how the hell did I find that?'
Yeah
And Johnny's been downing these bottles again
And I don't think I can stop him again
Cause every time he go out partying and saying he done
He find beer, and then start up again
And mom, now I feel like a loser
This girl, I can not ever lose her
And John find a bottle and he choose her
But there's nothing else for me out there
I'll make it or I'm going down there
The cloud that hung over my head
It don't run out of rain and now it put around there
I swear to God I can not stop and I'll never be finished
Until this whole goddamn city diminished
Until I stand up and say that I made it
And tell my mom I have a reason for living