Where I Am

We're told that we're all special at a very young age but maybe we're not
I know I believed every television commercial until my work ethic rots
The Internet prepared me for a world full of fantasy
Where fear of adversity eliminated diversity
And I need an audience just to have an original thought
And I tried to get right with God so many times, it doesn't feel right anymore
So put the salt of the world in these wounds and blind me with the light
And let me see this pain in a systematic brain so I still have some fight in me

The lover in my heart says it's okay to break
Be vigilant, 'cause vigilance is something I can take
The fight that's in my heart says love can't be made
You said loving me is such a pensive way to let yourself break

She said love isn't always fun, so it's hard to commit
Darling, just sleep on your stomach so you don't choke on your vomit
Getting it in your lungs, it's the only way you could still say we're in love
You said you would never lose a man
Who had to use a paycheck to make you break
He said we'll use the next one to get rid of your scars
But you said you wanted to keep them 'cause you're beautiful that way
And if it's right with God, it's right with me, I'll see we're shaming, darling

The lover in my heart says it's okay to break
Be vigilant, 'cause vigilance is something I can take
The fight that's in my heart says love can't be made
You said loving me is such a pensive way to let yourself break

And God, I love you and I hope to make sure you remember my name
So take these memories and make me feel sane
I pushed everyone I love away, and it hurts to say but I deserve to break

Just sleep on your stomach, so you don't choke on vomit when it fills up your lungs
It's the only way you could still say we're in love
Say we're in love, say it, even if you're being dishonest
I was dishonest when I said when I said you were better than what I lost