My Exercise Bike

This is my exercise bike
It's got a lot of features that I like
Like a seat
And pedals for my feet
And handlebars for me to hold onto

(That's all pretty standard.)

This is my exercise bike
You ought'a see just how fast I ride
Look at me
Going faster than the speed
Of a pregnant cheetah

(How pregnant?)
(Half pregnant.)

It's like I'm riding in the Tour De France
But in his mind that's what he means
Don't need no drugs to boost my performance
Just test his pee you'll see he's clean
Got to the top, totally on my own
He's a man of his word
No that's not a syringe of human growth hormones
It's happy gerbil herbs

(Herbs.)

This is just my exercise bike
The resistance goes from low to high
And when it's high
It makes it seem like I
Am going up an incline

(Well, yeah, that's generally how they work.)

You need to stop it with your accusing
He's just a natural athlete
No I'm not getting a blood transfusion
It's just a bag of pudding
And look at this ball, it's not deflated at all
This is irrelevant to this conversation
And no I didn't send my cousin to the
Congo to extract the DNA of a gorilla
And then formulate it into a sports drink which I personally adore
It's called Gorilla Gene

This is just my exercise bike