Vontrail

This one feels illegal, this one's for my people
This for all the folks that went from raggedy to being regal
This is for, this for VONTRAIL

And I tell you I done wrote a million lines
Scratched it out a million times
And it still doesn't equate to the times I felt irate
Stuck out like a sore thumb every time I tried to relate
I spent 22 years looking my biggest fears in the face

I done felt pressure, seen my best friend get buried
Almost lost both my parents, I've almost lost my conscience
Character's been insulted
From folks that told me they love me
Nowadays it's hard to trust it
Nowadays I keep silent cus words can be flipped for the public
Honesty's not rewarded
Passions isn't supported
Missions being aborted
Righteousness being abolished
I'll give from my heart and pocket just to have Vontrail to talk with
That was the homie

And I was guilt tripping, back when he had passed away
I didn't have no choice he tried to spend the night that Saturday
He coulda got down with the dual shocks but was shocked down by bad wires
I lost all control and my drive like some bad tires, uh
I remember vividly, how I got the news and how it messed with me, literally
I had just left camp, it was on a Wednesday
My dad talk to my neighbor about how acting friendly could take you from places like Tilden
All the way to Tinley
Then my sister called all things went into a frenzy
My pops yelled, "WHAT" while unlocking the screen door
And called granny up for clarity cus he needed more
But before that he told me he died I couldn't believe it
And judging off of his frantics I could tell that he couldn't either
After getting verification, he softly said "yeah, he's dead"
And all thoughts that once ran came to a halt in my head
I ran to my room, cried a lot, then had to repent
I figured nobody was safe and God was calling me next
I ain't sleep for a week, couldn't eat for some days
Crying gave me heavy migraines and a puffy face
Seeing's believing so I went to the chill out spot
The whole hood was heated the news was all within our block
I went to the funeral, sat in the balcony
Along with some familiar faces up in Randolph's faculty, huh
I bawled my eyes out, I hit God with so many questions
Like why did HIS soul and body have to be disconnected
Why was it HIS time to go instead of somebody else's
I was so selfish, I was twelve, I couldn't help it
But God knows what He's doing
HE took him straight to heaven I seen it and told the reverend I dreamed it it wasn't lucid
I still remember you, I'm holding onto memories
I'll name one of my sons Vontrail so you'll live for centuries
I'll tell your legacy, with no discrepancy
So while your bones turn to dust
Your soul could rest in peace
REST IN PEACE
IT STILL HURTS, LOVE YOU ALWAYS