Staring at the Sun

I used to walk down the block, not thinkin' a lot
Thinking of pain, you know there ain't too much changed
I had a girl, who had more problems than me
Now I'm across the sea, 'n she's in Wimbledon sippin' tea at a coffeeshop
Talkin' to her friends about me
I think about it and I get kinda rowdy
But it doesn't matter now, 'cause the past is the past
It doesn't last like a big piece of shit in the grass
I didn't talk about love, kisses and hugs
I don't believe in that, so I shove it under the rug
Never thought this thing could happen to me
Another sick twisted version of L-O-V-E
S-P-E-K
That's my name, I say it aloud when I look into the mirror to blame
Another day, yes another routine, I'm not so keen
I got places to go, know what I mean

You're looking for a reason
To blame it all on me
I'm looking in the mirror
There's nothing left to see
If loving you forever, is like loving you for fun
Loving you forever, is like staring at the sun

Now the days done change, but I'm still the same person,
Worse than the best human, yet better than the worst one,
I write like I say it, say it how I write it,
Had a million loves, yes some of them requited,
And it doesn't matter 'cause I hold it in this moment,
And these moments all add up and before I know it I'm holdin'
Pieces of time, integrated in this rhyme pattern,
She want a ring, do I look like my name is Saturn
I've been cold, and it's not too bold
I'm real young but they tell me that I act real old
Sometimes I got styles written in languages
Bandages wrapped around my brain I can manage it
They call me crazy 'cause I'm out on my own
But I been tellin' them this is a jail, it's not a throne

You're looking for a reason
To blame it all on me
I'm looking in the mirror
There's nothing left to see
If loving you forever, is like loving you for fun
Loving you forever, is like staring at the sun

It's mad, you think I've got more problems than you
You've got more problems than anyone else I ever knew

You're looking for a reason
To blame it all on me
I'm looking in the mirror
There's nothing left to see
If loving you forever, is like loving you for fun
Loving you forever, is like staring at the sun