A Stitch in Time

Oh there was a woman and she lived on her own
She slaved on her own and she skivvied on her own
She'd two little girls and two little boys
And she lived all alone with her husband

For her husband he was a hunk of a man
A chunk of a man and a drunk of a man
He was a hunk of a drunk and skunk of a man
Such a boozing bruising husband

For he would come home drunk each night
He thrashed her black and he thrashed her white
He thrashed her too within an inch of her life
Then he slept like a log, did her husband

One night she gathered her tears all round her shame
She thought of the bruising and cried with the pain
"Oh you'll not do that ever again
I won't live with a drunken husband."

Her husband came home drunk each night
And he thrashed her black and he thrashed her white
He thrashed her too within an inch of her life
And then he slept like a log, did her husband

But as he lay and snored in bed
A strange old thought came into her head
She went for the needle, went for the thread
And went straight in to her sleeping husband

And she started to stitch with a girlish thrill
With a woman's heart and a seamstress' skill
She bibbed and tucked with an iron will
All around her sleeping husband

Oh the top sheet, the bottom sheet too
The blanket stitched to the mattress through
She stitched and stitched for the whole night through
Then she waited till dawn on her husband

And when her husband awoke with a pain in his head
He found that he could not move in bed
"Sweet Christ, I've lost the use of me legs!"
But this wife just smiled at her husband

For in her hand she held the frying pan
With a flutter in her heart she given him a lam
He could not move but he cried: "God damn!"
"Don't you swear," she cries to her husband

And then she thrashed him black, she thrashed him blue
With the frying pan and the colander too
With the rolling pin, just a stroke or two
Such a battered and bleeding husband

And she says, "If you ever come home drunk any more
I'll stitch you in, I'll thrash you more
Then I'll pack my bag and I'll be out the door
I'll not live with a drunken husband!"

Oh isn't it true what small can do
With a thread and a thought and a stitch or two
He's wiped his slate and his boozing's through
It's goodbye to a drunken husband