Ambien Flights

Travel back to Cali thinking how I made it this far
Struggling to get played thinking rapping was sub par
Wishing that I could manifest what I hear when my head hit the mattresses
Brain fires synapses and births verses on accident
Earth turning like tracks running the axis'
Calendars burning with wasted days such extravagance
Dive into the fathom of the depths of paralysis mind numbing
My mind doesn't beat my shortcomings
So I try to trick myself, tip the ego off the ledge
Hard to ask someone for help without the prospect of revenge
I always been the type of guy to duck my head
And choose the path of least resistance careful where I tread
Forgot my totem, I need a kick to set me straight
Contemplate my current slate, can't tell if I'm awake
Can't sell my message when my conscience steady guessin'
Waiting for that crescent moon to kick it to impressive tunes
Out the static, pragmatic with bad habits
Cinematic in REM so charismatic
The aromatics are thick painting a symphony of velvety kicks
Wake up hoping it clicks
Second guessing every session, stressing on every word
Accepting that I'll lose the magic and it might never return
Just go back to sleep and be the man
I might never wake up from Neverland

Where do the words even go
If it's in my brain when I sleep how come I can't access it while I'm awake
If I write a dope verse when I'm awake does that mean that I'm really asleep
I don't even know I don't even know
I don't even know

I had a dream I was in a bagel shop
With madlib the beat kondunctah, givin props
He was playing me some new stuff on the shop radio
Smells of cannabis and bagel dough
Unheard material, beats and sketches and flips
He was telling me which sample was which
It felt so real, the god preaching, giving me tips
Then woke I up, pissed off & uneasy
More lost beats in my sleep
Now it's back to the coffee & vinyl stacks for me
Forever searching for the urge
For that feeling to jump up smack the fucking ceiling
Music on the mind when I'm alseep
Now it's time to awake & abuse my MPC
Basement, no heat, hoodie on, happy as can be as I retreat
The rookies gone, baby monitors and boom bap, forever in a fog
I persue that cuz this the shit that makes me feel confident to do that
Make beats in solidarity, pass them off like charity
Yeah that time is over
If I'm going to lose sleep over this I might as well try to see the dollar signs
Until then this night is mine
Red wine while I'm flying with design
I recline as I drift off back to sleep
Headed back to the bagel shop, quasimoto sittin shotgun in the jeep
Repeat Repeat Repeat