The Old Me

I'm losing my youth, but there's not much left to lose
'Cause I've already lost myself
And I don't want to lose you, too

My sense of purpose
Has been lost beneath the smolder
Of years passing by, burned from growing older

I miss the old me
He didn't have to force being happy
He lived free of insecurities
And found solace in complacency
But now I see my faults have left distaste of my name
My appearance leaves my mirror to shame

I don't feel happy with myself
It's something I don't know if I can help.
I miss the old me

Made more aware each day
I've become obsessed with my flaws
Afraid that they can't be covered
Afraid that they're all in me you saw

Always apologizing for things I cannot control
Afraid I'll die without a family to hold
Always leaving last in fear they'll mock me behind my back
Afraid it'd be for those parts of me that I lack

I don't feel happy with myself
It's something I don't know if I can help.
I miss the old me

I've missed all my chances
I'll never get another
I'll never get back those feelings I regret I shared
The time I wasted
Or the warmth of my grandmother
The nightly routine drags on
Cycling through the thoughts of the ones that I've loved and lost
Even the thoughts I abhor
For some reason, I long for
But nothing fixes me anymore

I'm sorry if I can't be what's expected on me
Please make me what you want to see
I miss the old me