Endings

Welcome to the song that imma lose my fuckin mind to
Damaged darkened thoughts have got me wishing I had swine flu
Hit me with your car come on and help me end my life dude
Start a fuckin battle then I'll never even fight you

Walkin through the rain tryin to catch a bolt of lightning
Imma Jump into the street but wait until the proper timing
At the tracks I'm on my knees waiting for trains not even crying
I imagine hitting ending and the thoughts are satisfying

Remember always wondered how my death would come and save my life
Maybe heart attack or maybe fill me with a sharpened knife
Maybe starve myself to death or walk along the road at night
And end up on the pavement man these thoughts are fuckin feelin right

See I'm the type to think of different ways that I could croak
I'm takin shots of fuckin bleach until the liquid melts my throat
Cuz every object that I see I want you all to fuckin know
It shows me how to murder me so many ways that I could go

Ill bite the bullet
Grab the trigger fuckin pull it
Put a blade inside my head and dig around for where my skull is
I don't want to be a human with my mind so fuckin ruthless
Dreams of houses crashin down ive seen my family hang from nooses

Tell me how a kid has visions of his family swingin
I remember dreaming seeing all their fuckin bodies swimmin
I got up and it was empty thats the house that we had lived in
Not a fuckin soul alive and then the water took me with it

I had a dream one night I was chillin with some friends
Fell asleep for 20 minutes saw the fuckin world end
Like to think my mind ain't vicious but I guess i can't pretend
That I'm not thinking bout my death and here we fuckin go again

If you're going take me with you
Don't be selfish slit my wrists you
Can't believe the shit I been through
Can you help me find my pistol

Cause I actually happily picture tragedy happening cause without it is maddening
Cause a scene till they're Cappin me

Hop the gate into the pen where all the predators are kept
Or go and wrestle with a snake until it bites me in the neck
I swear I'll never get a chance to tell you half the shit I dreamt
But they would fuckin lock me up if I was one step to the left

Eat some fuckin chicken that's been sitting for a year
So I get fuckin salmonella tell me death is gettin near
Or blow me up with tnt or shoot me in the stratosphere
Park a dump truck on my chest and make my brain come out my ears

Got suggestions hit me up I'm always lookin to expand
Come and get me, pick me up and kick me out on highway 10
Tell em hit me semi trucks are goin 80 nows my chance
Okay I'm going wish me luck and no we'll never meet again

Get some liquor let's go racing maybe flip the fuckin car
I've said so many different ways id say I've probly gone too far
But when you're staring at it's face and death is tallying your scars
It starts to make some perfect sense why living is so fucking hard

Picture painting portraits red from puncturing your veins
And wondering if maybe now you really are going insane
Ride a motorcycle fast and sloppy get it sliding in the rain
And lay that fucker down so hard it liquefies my brain

Nobody told me the way that my mind would mold me
Imagining all these stories of tragedy that is gory and
Nobody told me I'm haunted cuz good is boring
Preminitions of my death are steady waiting in the mornings