Not Even Tryin'

The doctor called me up at home
Said "I told you from the start that it didnt't look good.
Now that the test results are back
I'm afraid the sky ahead of you looks pretty black.
You may have weeks, or months, but certainly not another year."

When I picked up the phone, man, I knew I was dying
When I called back home soon my mother was crying
I claimed my chances were good but she could tell I was lying
But there is nothing worse than if you're not even trying

You can imagine I was shocked
Why did it have to be my boat that was rocked
This didn't make no sense to me
I kept repeating the words the doctor said to me
"You may have weeks, or months, but certainly not another year."

When I picked up the phone, man, I knew I was dying
And when I called back home soon my father was crying
I claimed my chances were good, but he could tell I was lying
But there's nothing worse than if you're not even trying

Another month had quietly passed away
I made a list with my worst mistakes and regrets
I called up my brother for the first time in fifteen years
Repeated the words the doctor had said to me:
"You may have weeks, or months, but certainly not another year."

That time I picked up the phone, man, I knew I was dying
When I called my brother after soon he was crying
I claimed my chances were good but he could tell I was lying
But there's nothing worse than if you're not even trying

Thirteen months have passed since then
And here I stand as if to prove the doctor wrong
I couldn't forget his words so I put them in this song
But now I had to go and change the
Lyrics 'cause I'm still going strong
I hope for weeks and months and years to come

And so I picked up the phone and told the doctor I am not dying
I said I made up my mind and I am done with my crying
You may say what you like, you may not like what I'm saying
I'm just singing along and I was not even praying
Not even tryin'
Not even tryin'
I was not even tryin'
I was not even tryin'