These Days

I don't know how much it cost these days (these days)
I don't know how much I got these days (these days)
I don't know what I want these days (these days)
I don't know how to live these days (save me)

I just want to wake up with a smile on my face
Why I keep thinking I might be dying today
Tried to make progress but I'm in the way
Worst self-critic, low self-interest
Shallow ass gimmicks got me doubting, self-willing
I can still walk but I still feel imprisoned
Maybe I'm too focused on the mufucking mission
Derailing my path cuz I'm scared of finally winning
Maybe I lost the fire, remaining ashes ain't enough
Hard to move when ain't no fuel up in the trunk
Burnt out like soldered glass, no more push in my shoulder pads
Can't take a step, I'm falling on my ass
Might as well start digging it
Cuz I don't know what I'd do if I ain't ready yet
Maybe I love living that no esteem pity shit
But lord knows I've given too much to not be getting it

I don't know how much it cost these days (these days)
I don't know how much I got these days (these days)
I don't know what I want these days (these days)
I don't know how to live these days (save me)
I don't know how much it cost these days (these days)
I don't know how much I got these days (these days)
I don't know what I want these days (these days)
I don't know how to live these days (save me)

Having a hard time, tell my father I miss him
Me and him, a living contradiction
Two sides of the same coin, mine a little tainted
He an angel, do I deserve someone so amazing?
Done too much bad I don't know if he accept it
I swear the fam precious
But we in different timelines
That's why when he watching in my mind I'm still neglected
I don't know if my goals align what they expecting
God bless him and my mother, never trade 'em for another
So far gone I can't reach 'em, they too above it
I miss my little sisters, it's been 3 winters since I seen 'em
Cuz all I do is work and keep on dreaming
Didn't see myself in this position if I'm being honest
Like really what's the reason
Lack of effort or my narrow vision got me dealing
With missing what it is to be a fuckin' human being

I don't know how much it cost these days (these days)
I don't know how much I got these days (these days)
I don't know what I want these days (these days)
I don't know how to live these days (save me)
I don't know how much it cost these days (these days)
I don't know how much I got these days (these days)
I don't know what I want these days (these days)
I don't know how to live these days (save me)