Sad Rad Lad

I'm a sad, rad lad
I don't know what I'm doing with my life
Or why I'm in school
But I know
There's gotta be a reason I'm here at some point
When I was a kid
I was taught to believe in a god that required me to feel guilt
In order to be happy
So I said fuck that, you know
I'm not gonna believe in that
Why shouldn't I be happy
And this album that I've created
Even though it sounds a lot like Car Seat Headrest
And that kind of disappoints me a little bit
It's kind of an exploration in my own insecurities and it's just
It's really personal to me
Godspeed to those in love with someone with a mind that talks too loud
Will I ever get a job
Will I ever figure out my homework
Will my major be a major or will it be my passion
Will my father ever accept me for who I am
Will I end up doing what I want or
Will I end up working to live and living to work
Will I calm down enough to focus long enough to gather information
And and not read the same information again
And again and again and again and again and again andalsnfasmdf
Will I ever write a song in which I'm proud of the product
and not disappointed that I sound like a shittier Will Toledo
Will I ever amount to the things that I want to amount to
Will I ever get to the point when I can say I love you
And mean it and I don't feel lost when I don't hear it back
Will I create the things I want to create in an orderly
And sensical fashion and will my parents be proud of the person I've become
Will my loved one be proud will I be proud
(Alright this time is it loud enough?
I etched your face onto the back of my eyes
Is it time to sleep yet so I can see you again?
I'm dragging my knuckles against the ground, my hands are bleeding
Clench my jaw so much my gums are bleeding
Aaaaa!
Matterhorn yodelers screaming at me from atop the Walt Disney roller coaster
The Matterhorn, trademarked
Tell me how you really feel and what you wanna say but break it to me gently
God I fucking hated writing these songs)
I look back on old journals and I realize that nowadays i am happy
It's just I'm a little nervous sometimes
And I hope that the people around me can realize that
And find patience in me but I really am doing better and
I hope that one day I will become
I can look at myself and realize that life really is doing better than it used to be
And I'm comfortable with the person I've become
And I hope that one day my friends can look at themselves in the mirror and say the same thing