Daddy

'(Akiva Schaffer)'
Papa did you see me hit a home run last night?
I lit the stadium on fire, I was Oakland's pride
Daddy, did you see me?
Look what I can do, yeah
Daddy, do you hear me crying? (Crying)
Daddy, can you see I'm dying? (Dying)
Oh, Dad
Tell 'em, José

(Andy Samberg)
Ever since little league
Middle school, middle league
Always played technically
Perfect like a symphony
Little me got much bigger, faster, stronger, Dad
Hit it so long, but you always want it longer, Dad
But therapy's for losers
Little boy, therapy's for losers

(Akiva Schaffer & "Andy Samberg")
Buy all my steroids in bulk ("Costco")
Wanna get big as The Hulk ("Hogan")
Stronger than Wolverine teeth ("Logan")
Answer to 'Where's the beef?' ("Slogan")
"First, I put on my jock
Then both of my socks
Parachute Hammer pants and my Reeboks
Hot tub inside a limousine at Chuck E. Cheese
Dad, look at me"

(Jorma Taccone, "Andy Samberg")
José, heard you went on a pretty hot date
the other night. Care to tell us about it?
"Hey, come on. You guys know I don't kiss and tell"

(Akiva Shaffer, "Andy Samberg")
"Oh, I went on a date with Madonna
She said that she wanted Cuban babies
She seemed like a smart business lady
But I didn't find her physically attractive"
I went on a date with my mama
Took her out for all-you-can-eat shrimp
She said she was proud of her baby (That's me)
So, I guess we both had a wild week
"Therapy's for losers, Dad said
Therapy's for losers"

(Akiva Shaffer, "Andy Samberg", "'Both"')
"Keep your mouth shut"
No snitchin'
"About the steroids"
No snitchin'
"About the steroids"
About the steroids
"'About the steroids
About the steroids"'
Don't fuck up a good thing while you got it