I'm Alive

My life is a rollercoaster of emotions
Home is with you and without you, I feel like I'm homeless, hopeless
Don't miss out on my love
Holdin' grudges never got me nowhere, so I let it all go
If I can't love myself, how the fuck do I love someone else?
But I know I want you
Never been the one to beat around the bush
So, do you want me too?
Every day closer to my casket

Time wasted waitin', debatin' on you, but savin' my breath
Communicatin' late nights when I'm up pacin' back and forth (yeah, yeah)
Baby, you don't wanna be mine?
Then why you calling me all the time?
Playin' with my mind
Takin' advantage, knowin' that I'm fragile (yeah, yeah)
Well-spoken, but I'm broken
Hopin' you would not leave my heart frozen
Feel like I'm close to explodin'
Floatin' through the rivers and the oceans 'til I'm gone

I'm alive, I'm a liar, I'ma die never lovin' myself, yeah, yeah
I'ma ride with my baby girl Nina tucked under my belt
You know I just wanna get by, don't wanna feel nothin' inside
Swallow my pride, let that bitch ride
Let her get high, let her get all of me, yeah

I'm alive, I'm a liar, I'ma die never lovin' myself, yeah, yeah
I'ma ride with my baby girl Nina tucked under my belt
You know I just wanna get by, don't wanna feel nothin' inside
Swallow my pride, let that bitch ride
Let her get high, let her get all of me, yeah

I can't have no artificial love
I need that real, genuine love above anything
Baby, you fuckin' with a trust fund baby fuckboy that never been through a thing
And I felt pain I never wanted to feel
And I seen things I never wanted to see
And I just want someone to want me to be me
Balls deep in a bitch like

I got what you need, baby, leave it to me
You'll see what I mean when you give me the time
Mind corrupted from my past
I get into it knowin' it won't last, but I'm codependent
Baby Bone can't be alone
Panic attacks at home, so where do I go now?
The lone wolf left his comfort zone
And opened up the door for whores to let it run its course

Of course, I know love is torture
Never been known to do what I'm supposed to
So I left it all, invested all my time in you
Before I knew if it was mutual
Please don't give me a reason to leave, I need ya, ya
And I know I can't keep up with ya
Guess I really gotta give up on ya, ya, ya

I'm alive, I'm a liar, I'ma die never lovin' myself, yeah, yeah
I'ma ride with my baby girl Nina tucked under my belt
You know I just wanna get by, don't wanna feel nothin' inside
Swallow my pride, let that bitch ride
Let her get high, let her get all of me, yeah

I'm alive, I'm a liar, I'ma die never lovin' myself, yeah, yeah
I'ma ride with my baby girl Nina tucked under my belt
You know I just wanna get by, don't wanna feel nothin' inside
Swallow my pride, let that bitch ride
Let her get high, let her get all of me, yeah

I'm alive, I'm a liar, I'ma die never lovin' myself, yeah, yeah
I'ma ride with my baby girl Nina tucked under my belt
You know I just wanna get by, don't wanna feel nothin' inside
Swallow my pride, let that bitch ride
Let her get high, let her get all of me, yeah