It's Cool

Here for a shitty time, not a long time
Pessimistically just waiting on the bad vibes
To catapult the night into a panic stricken fever dream
Paralyzed by everything and I can't even fucking scream

Sinking feeling take me away
All encompassing apathy
I can't enjoy the things I love
Everything just fucking sucks
In the morning all alone
Just smoke a blunt then spray cologne

Take that lighter out
Inhale what you need to
Deal with things I say
That make you less like you
And then you hate yourself
Then whole day
And I just sit around
A clumsy fucking waste

What's even sending shivers down my spine?
The thought that I can't be around anyone tonight
Without breaking down or freaking out
Terrified by every sound
Aren't you worried when you finally see
The person you've been pretending to be
Has taken over and started wearing the skin
That you had once felt comfortable in

Such a long night
Want to exist again
You wanna find yourself
But you don't know anything
So once it dissolves you
Get in the same thought loops
Gotta stop feeling stuck
And just start being you

I'm just insecure
And so uncomfortable
Everything that makes you miserable
Reckless and endangering
Myself with every choice I make
Like burning bridges while it's fucking raining gasoline

Someday they'll say the name
Of everything I hate
And I won't hesitate
Tell them to shut their mouths
And walk away
It's getting on my nerves
To know of my own worth
It's cool, I know some friends who
Got a place to hang with me