Windmills

I couldn't lift my body up
I begin to feel something more intense
which is that life is an endless stream of events
that held no hope

Sometimes I wake up and i just feel
Nothing I just can't do nothing so I sit still
Sad for no reason uncompleted in a mist field
Life tugging me i just spin like windmills
Go
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round

I'm so stuck
Lost in the demeaning of trust
And feeling like I'll never really know the meaning love
It ain't just
Knowing that I care too much
I hate "was"
Why are people changing up
Time rush by so fast
The Memories flash
And feelings relapse
Rekindling ash
From bridges that no longer extend
And I begin to be sad
Like mel stop living in past
Where the fuck has my life gone
Get away from me loneliness
Anxiety, Paranoia
So broke I need ownership
I.D. I've been chastise
No I am no socialist
So awkward it's plain
And these laughs are like ornaments
Yea this is my monologue
But everything kosher
I feel like i lost it all
Yeah everything over
My peers moving on and on
Got babies and college bonds
So focus on all the wrong
I'm choked got me provoked-
Like car alarms

Sometimes I wake up and I just feel
Nothing I just can't do nothing so I sit still
Sad for no reason uncompleted in a mist field
Life tugging me i just spin like windmills
Go
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round

It's the sad boy you know from the back of ya math class
I'm use to feeling like I'm the one that they laugh at
Moving at the slowest pace
Try to have a little faith
With a smile on my face
But I know that shit is fake
Cause everybody says a smile makes you more appealing
But it doesn't match up with the way that I'm feeling
And I'm feeling like
Well
I can't put a finger on
Bullshit going through my head and I linger on it
Eating alive like its Tokyo Ghoul
And I don't really wanna hang out with most of you fools
It's nothing personal
I just been more and more belligerent
And now what I feeling is
Something so villainous
So all I need is a moment alone
And hopefully I can end up with a friendlier tone
Yea
Until then all these bridges burn
My head keeps spinning as the windmill turns
Damn

Sometimes I wake up and I just feel
Nothing I just can't do nothing so I sit still
Sad for no reason uncompleted in a mist field
Life tugging me i just spin like windmills
Go
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round

I'm so stuck
And I dont think ill ever get up
Buried under
Hopelessness all the negative stuff
Lost my innocence
I benefit from prejudice scums
Now I know what to expect
Ain't no pressure I'm numb
Gaining weight always find myself eating and shit
Sleeping and sick
Of dealing with life's reasons and shit
When I found out about my cancer wasn't sad that I might die
More sad I was homeless grieving last moments alive
Praise god
For chemotherapy helped me survive
Like
Needles and pills needles and pills
Next day
Needles and pills needles and pills
Radiate
Needles and pills needles and pills
Only one was my mom in my vicinity
1 or 2 ask about me said "I'm feeling breeze"
See me now better hope you find a friend in me
Cause if the fame hit I'm spelling it F.A.M. and E

Sometimes i wake up and i just feel
Nothing i just can't do nothing so I sit still
Sad for no reason uncompleted in a mist field
Life tugging me I just spin like windmills
Go
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round
Round and round round and round