Culpable

I guess it starts exactly right there
I mean when the realization finally hits you like
Was this the picture I drew,
Was this the picture I was supposed to paint
And you just keep on searching for a place to put the...

Lies that I crafted now lies in my closet
Arrogance abandoned fears that my pride ate
Cynical commitments stuffed on my daily bread
Vertical oddities, inflated renegade
Polemic safeguarding my incurring self
Am I a poltergeist causing disturbance
Pity pillow with egos inflicted
I can't doze off, wish sleep was my serenade
Reckoning every fault with a cold rhythm
I overlook the loophole causing my mayhem
"Lust for some solace", this circle is addictive
Need a grave to bury excuses that I seek
Why am I blind to the hurt I've been layering
Circle too small, ain't no one I've been favoring
Still got the love but with sympathy packaged in
Said I don't hate, why the fuck I've been degrading
And I tried to replicate the better picture I painted
Peerless for the run I've been running, I hated-
Decorating every devastated self I attained
And I couldn't survive the storm that later rained
So I looked for a shelter to bed in
The promises I made that went fucking missing
Apologies that I owe, here you have it
And gratitude sprinkled modestly beneath it
My mind is the drug I hate that I'm its addict
An apostate for the self-trust I believe I need
I need a sedative a partial remedy
Stick with this vanity like its a part of me

And then
Everything felt so culpable
Wondering if I did fuck my soul
Everything I did felt culpable
Wondering if I did fuck my soul



Credits
Writer(s): Blossom Hazarika
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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