Hand That Fed Me

Uh uh uh the hand that fed me how I wish one day you'd get me
Attached to arms that barely hugged your son that shit is deadly
Connected to fingers that only pointed at me directly
How could you love me when you can't accept me
When you met me it was '91 you was 17 and a month
In my daddy bed not knowin' that, that was all that he wants
Inside of 1295 7E too young to be loved but old enough to do the things that led to me
I mean it's forever love 'cause theres no me without that
I laugh to think you drank a slim fast from thinkin' you fat
I know a baby with a baby's like sittin' in prison
You made a life that didn't keep you from livin' recall a visit
From some stranger asking where you worked for what it was
I swore up and down my momma worked in town inside the clubs
Girl you grew up somethin' fast you was looking for love
When it was home waiting for you in Luv's tell me how much your momma love you

To feel as if your presence was grace
Why can't you just be there for me without it thrown in my face
To feel like that I was born with unconditional love
Without the one birthed me treatin' me like everybody does to know
Nobodies perfect if my old earth was she'd know that I needed
A mother not a judge to feel as if I
Ain't have to see this shit to finally understand
How hard it was to hardly raise a man

Uh snuck in your room and heard your albums and that's what introduced me to rap
When I was 5 you said my poppa left and not coming back that shit hurt
But not as much as when you kicked me to the curb
Or hearing that I won't amount to shit within your words I know
I get my nasty mouth from you that much is true
And the confusion between being blunt and being spiteful too It's like we
Never related to eachother fuck a daddy
I was jealous of relationships niggas had with their mothers
Ours is different surprised that I'm alive and not in prison
I don't blame you for my choices or the options I was given
It's just so sad to say that I don't know how to show
Affection towards the people present in my timing of growth
I know it's people in life that put you down when you fight
And now I finally understand that normal doesn't make it right
I count my blessings for my granny they came more than a dozen
I had another mother there when you wasn't tell me how much your momma love you

To know that we could never be close
To know that you just too defensive to admit it at most
To see it wasn't a baby that you wanted but a lover
Remember I was 10 I said you should of used a rubber you know
But life goes on just know I wish you the best
And may your days be void of bitterness and stress
To feel as if I ain't have to see this shit to finally understand
How hard it was to hardly raise a man but still you know I'll always love you