This Can't Be Life

Geah, whassup?
This to all my street niggaz, project niggaz
Real niggaz worldwide
Let's reflect, e'rybody got a story
We all ghetto B, here's mine
Geah

See, I was born in sewage, born to make bomb music
Flow tight like I was born Jewish
Used the streets as a conduit, I kept arms
38 longs inside my mom's Buick
At any given moment Shawn could lose it, be on the news
Iron cuffs, arms through it, or stuffed with embalmin' fluid
Shit, I'm goin' through it, mom dukes too
Tears streamin' down her pretty face, she got her palms to it

My life is gettin' too wild
I need to bring some sort kinda calm to it
'Bout to lose it, voices screamin', "Don't do it!"
It's like '93, '94, 'bout the year
That Big and Mag dropped, and "Illmatic" rocked
Outta every rag drop, and the West had it locked
Everybody doin 'em, I'm still scratchin' on the block
Like, "Damn' I'ma be a failure"

Surrounded by thugs, drugs, and drug, paraphenalia
Cops courts, and their thoughts is to derail us
Three time felons in shorts with jealous thoughts
Tryin' figure where your mail is, guesstimate the weight you sellin'
So, they can send shots straight to your melon, wait!
It gets worse, baby momma water burst
Baby came out stillborn, still I gotta move on
Though my heart still torn, life gone from her womb
Don't worry, if it was meant to be, it'll be soon

This can't be life, this can't be love
This can't be right, there's gotta be more, this can't be us
This can't be life, this can't be love
This can't be right, there's gotta be more, this can't be us

Chill dog
Second oldest born, from Michelle Brown, my mother
Hell bound, grew with two sisters and one brother
Pop wasn't around, so many stories, that's another
I'm thinkin', "Damn, how my older sister gon' make me tougher"
When steel sharpens steel, I'ma keep it real
I'm tired of tryin' to hide my pain behind the syrups and pills
Dead to the world, stretched out like a corpse for real

Y'all niggaz thinkin' what y'all readin' in The Source is real
What my life like, you lookin' at the source, it's real
What your life like? Mine dog, of course it's real
Passin' judgment, you niggaz second-guessin' Beans
'Cause you don't eat swine don't make you Amin
Dog you know a couple suras, out the Qur'an
I guess you all on your din and I ain't on mine
Stop that Akki, 'fore I send shots though your body
Make 'em feel hell on earth before Allah drop thee

I feel the line's drawn here, nuttin' more can stop me
'Til them feds pick me up, or them boys pop me
There's only three things that make Mac not act like Beans
Amatullah Tisha, Po Aldin, Samir Amin
My seeds, dawg, gotta teach 'em that before I leave, dawg
Shit, I know that I'ma see 'em when I leave, dawg
I come back in the afterlife
Like fuck it, I done touched hell twice, what's the meanin'?

This can't be life, this can't be love
This can't be right, there's gotta be more, this can't be us
This can't be life (life), this can't be love (yeah)
This can't be right, there's gotta be more (uh), this can't be us

Now as I walk into the studio to do this with Jig'
I got a phone call from one of my nigs
Said my homeboy Reek, he just lost one of his kids
And when I heard that, I just broke into tears
And see in the second hand; you don't really know how this is
But when it hits that close to home, you feel the pain at the crib
So I called mine, and saddened my wife with the bad news
Now we both depressed, countin' our blessings 'cause Brad's two

Prayin' for young souls to laugh at life through the stars
Lovin' your kids just like you was ours
And I'm hurtin' for you dog, but ain't nobody pain is like yours
I just know that heaven'll open these doors
And ain't no bright side to losin' life, but you can view it like this
God's got open hands, homie, he in the midst of good company
Who loves all and hates not one

And one day you gon' be wit' your son
I could've rapped about my hard times on this song
But heaven knows I woulda been wrong
I wouldn'ta been right, it wouldn'ta been love
It wouldn'ta been life, it wouldn'ta been us
This can't be life

This can't be life, this can't be love
This can't be right, there's gotta be more, this can't be us
This can't be life, this can't be love
This can't be right, there's gotta be more, this can't be us

This can't be life