The Illinois Enema Bandit (Live 1975 FM Broadcast)

The illinois Enema Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose

Lord, the pitiful screams
Of them college-educated women
Boy, he'd just be tyin' 'em up
They'd be all bound down
Just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The illinois enema bandit juice

The illinois enema bandit
I heard it on the news
I heard it on the news
Bloomington illinois... he has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
Got a rubberized bag
And a hose on his arm
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump

The Illinois Enema Bandit
Some day he's gonna pay
Some day he's gonna pay
The police will say, "You're under arrest!"
And then the judge would have him for a special guest
The D.A. will order a secret test
And stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Then they'll put out a call for the jury folks
And the judge would say, "We must have order, no poo-poo jokes!"
They'll drag in the bandit for everybody to see
Sayin' "Don't nobody have no sympathy"
Sayin' Hot soapy water in the first degree!"
And then the Bandit sayin, "why is everybody pickin' on me all the time? "

Well, did you cause this misery?
Well, did you cause this misery?
Well, did you cause this misery?
Now, one girl shout: "let the Bandit be!"

Well, are you guility?
Won't you tell me now, what's your plea?
Another girl shout: "let the fiend go free!"
Well, are you guilty? Are you guilty?
Bandit, did you do these deeds?
The bandit say, "It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."
"It must be just what they all needs..."