Battered Coastline

For real
Sometimes I struggle with thoughts racing through my head
Times full of pain and heart break
There have been times where I almost gave up
But now I look back at all the pain in my life
And see how its changed my heart
Praise God

Cause I've been working hard
I've been on my grind
Trying to make a ripple in this timeline
Even though I've failed about a million times
I do this for God until the day I die
So much rain, rain, rain on my parade
But I can see the sunshine, I'm a be ok
About to be the storm of a lifetime
But I'm a stand firm on this coastline

Frustrated by the lack of motivation in me
Need a thrift store fast
Cause I'm feeling naked
Laid bare like a battered coastline
Call myself your disciple, but somehow manage to give you no time
Hypocritical in the deepest sense of the word
Trying to live right
While overcorrecting every curve
Crawling from the wreckage looking back to watch it burn
How much pain's it gonna take before this sinner ever learns?
Relying on myself is like self-medication
Alcohol and lusting after women, it doesn't work
Knees to the floor knowing Hell is all that I deserve
But you sent your son to wash the stains out of my shirt
God, I need you like a catamaran needs a sail
Cause my life is stagnant in the water
Without a steady gale
To send me on my way
It's your love that never fails
Even when we dive into the darkness
Sperm whale

Cause I've been working hard
I've been on my grind
Trying to make a ripple in this timeline
Even though I've failed about a million times
I do this for God until the day I die
So much rain, rain, rain on my parade
But I can see the sunshine, I'm a be ok
About to be the storm of a lifetime
But I'm a stand firm on this coastline

Contemplating life
Yea I've been thinking
About the shame that I feel from struggling with demons
Low pressure I can feel the storm building
Teardrops washing the floor
Sending prayers through the ceiling
Torpedos found their mark in this broken heart
Voices in my head circling like a Bull Shark
Forgive me God, feeling like I let you down
The relationship I had with her was never supposed to run aground
Now I'm floating in the wreckage of my own thoughts
Turning to pornography to try and replace what was lost
But all I got is regret feeling more lost
Afraid of their rejection
God I need to stop
And this is atypical, I'm going deep
Cause every second counts and talk is cheap
Crushing like an icebreaker in a heavy tide
With Jehovah at my side I will always slay Goliath

Cause I've been working hard
I've been on my grind
Trying to make a ripple in this timeline
Even though I've failed about a million times
I do this for God until the day I die
So much rain, rain, rain on my parade
But I can see the sunshine, I'm a be ok
About to be the storm of a lifetime
But I'm a stand firm on this coastline

Wake up
Experience the Great "I AM"
Who never forsakes his children who are caught in sin
Broken, no air choking
Heart was a desert until He flood it like an ocean
Raising up my white flag to the Captain
Cause our purpose is found by walking in His plan
World trying to entertain my flesh like a sea lion
But I was made to stand strong
White pine
Tripping on the same lies ashamed of what I do
And it's about time I realize that God's love is true
And the Bible is a banquet and I'm eating on that food
Cause Hell is not a fairytale
We have everything to lose
Hallelujah, Jesus I lift you high
For never giving up on me or my life
And one thing that I'll never comprehend
Is while I was stuck in sin
He was working on redemption

Cause I've been working hard
I've been on my grind
Trying to make a ripple in this timeline
Even though I've failed about a million times
I do this for God until the day I die
So much rain, rain, rain on my parade
But I can see the sunshine, I'm a be ok
About to be the storm of a lifetime
But I'm a stand firm on this coastline