Red Spandex Jeans (feat. Eddie)

Red is the colour
Of sin and danger
Red is the colour
Of my baby
Red is the colour
Of used tampons
And used maxi-thins
Red is the colour
Of my spandex jeans

I've got
Red spandex jeans
Like the kind they wear
On TV
The kind they wear
On MTV
Those red spandex jeans

Spandex is a funny name
I don't know where
They got it
But I guess that
It fits

Spandex jeans fit tight
Around my buns
Spandex jeans fit tight
Around the sun
And it holds out
All the light
From my ass
Well, you know my ass
Has never seen the sun

I was born
In red spandex jeans
Now my baby
Looks like me

Red is the colour
Of sin and danger
Red is the colour
Of my baby
Red is the colour
Of used tampons
And used maxi-thins
Red is the colour
Of my spandex jeans

I'm a weird
Son of a bitch
Better believe it
Why would I be singing
This song about
Red spandex jeans
If I didn't wear them?

When it becomes
Late at night
I take off my regular jeans
And put on my
Red spandex jeans
And run around in the hall
Trying to show off my crotch
But no one's there to look
So, I guess it's kind of
A waste of my time

But red is the colour of
Sin and danger
Red is the colour of
My baby