The Broadway Barbarian

Oh he boasted tow-rope arms
Had a mighty back on him
Scratches on his hairy shoulders
From the claws of screaming children

And he crossed his ivory card
While kids wept in his dreadful chair
For all the rotten ones were doomed
Before your gore just went everywhere

You just had no say in what he done
He'd charge your Father a Guinea each
Pulled all your teeth out, one by one
Till you had no bloody teeth

Mr Bertram
The Broadway Barbarian

Chewing bloody cotton wool
Our spirits felt so poor
A mouth of silver too much to bear
Spat out all our 'filluns' in Reservoir

Radioactive zombie processions
Where the gravel lawns are mowed
With blood dripping from gummy chasms
Oh how we glowed in Borrie road

Impossible to eat your tea
A lemonade-straw-from your mother
Swearing you'll never eat another ginger nut
But Aspro... you want another

Take a rainy stroll down Broadway today
But keep your eyes down in the gutter
Like a miner panning for his luck
You might find our little bits of silver