A Note to My First Love

It's been three months since we talked
Knowin' you, you wouldn't say that's a lot
But, my heart it ain't had not enough time to mend
Pops sending me pictures from the hospital bed
Ain't drownin' in liquor I been stuck in my bed
Pacin' the floor of my bedroom instead
Thinkin' how much more do I gotta take
To much more and yeah my heart I'll break
Into pieces
Losin' one reason I dream big
Missin' out on sleep in my own crib
Its 5 am and I ain't tired yet
My body movin' like this dryer yeah
Put that shit on high, and run it up for 90 yeah
Ran it two times it ain't dry it yet
Uhmm yeah
Gotta keep it pimpin'
Rappin' now
Can't let another nigga catch me lackin' now
Know they love to see it when you down n out
Drinkin' drownin' yeah keep wylin' out
Got a team but, them niggas never ask about
Drinkin' drownin' yeah we wylin' out
Got a team but, them niggas never ask about
Yeah I got a team but, they never ask about

They keep telling me to talk it out
I said it's nothing left to talk about
They keep telling me to talk it out
I said it's nothing left to talk about

Got me feelin' like a typhoon without the moon
I could never make a monsoon
I could never make a monsoon

They keep tellin' me to talk it out
But the person I vent to no longer receivin' my calls
Gave you a piece of my soul
You said you'd never leave me alone
But, here I am again
Stuck in a rut wit no light to find
Just some leftover cash from a trip I never had
Tried to visit places that you touched in the past
Tryna find a piece of me that I never had
Still tryna build myself to be a man
I found some peace in the south of Japan
Thought about movin' there like you did France
But I gotta keep chasin' dreams cause you can't
I gotta keep chasin' dreams cause you can't
Umm yeah
Call me
Beep me
Whenever it's possible
You know I hate leavin' voicemails
Uncomfortable
I rather talk up in person
And be vulnerable
And be vulnerable