Lost

Im lost for the first time is the worst time
Im lost not the first time out of sunshine
Im lost for the first time is the worst time
Im lost not the first time out of sunshine

See what its like to be in my shoes what its like to duck when the kettle heats
When the shower leaks when i fucking breathe im too loud to speak
Now im feeling weak now i gotta leave
Im begging im saying please i just wanna smile and cry and feel some love from the people id die for
Dont get me wrong they give it they do
Its just that i dont really take it in well
A little dark but im happy i am alone but im happy how can i think that i am not
How can i wish when i got allot how could i ask to be left alone
When some of you aint even got home
I aint got the right to think i aint never had a light indespite of my pain
and lack to obtain the feeling that makes me the same
I think i can tell when im about to lose when the sun has set and the moon is up
Then i lose the reigns of iron cup suddenly these chains got me locked up
bloodstains now and im hooked on
Cold steel when the love gone
Cold steel when i need some
Cold steel let the blood run

Im lost for the first time is the worst time
Im lost not the first time outta sunshine
Im lost for the first time is the worst time
Im lost not the first time outta sunshine

In the rabbit hole sink to the mind
Dreams are reality unseen to the lies
Seems like i gotta seventeen reasons to cry
Dreams that have told lies to the mind no
I aint wanna drown i aint wanna fall outta time
I aint wanna close my eyes i aint wanna close eyes
When i do i lose sight of the man in the corner of the room
I aint wanna drown i aint wanna fall outta time
I aint wanna close my eyes when i do i lose sun
I am blind deaf and dumb and i was always scared of the dark but the night is liar
If you saw a man standing in the corner of the room in a light wouldnt doubt it
But now a question if i dreaming eyes open and reality screams back scenes from the past
Bad memories those times when a boy got no doubt no shield for the heat no cold for the tea
But a cracked vase for a mind fucking mad at himself all the time
I aint never gonna close eyes when i do
i lose sight of the man in corner of the room like im trying to fucking breathe on the moon

But now i can see now i got roots n the ground like a tree
A huff and a puff you think im naive
You aint gonna tell me to leave
You aint gonna tell me to leave

I will never bow to the moon
I will never lose heart
Infront of the judges i use art but at times i admit i abuse that
No i have beed raised
Living the temple of rage
Ducking the people i love
Forgiving the people i dont
You aint gonna know when they blow
Blow up and shatter they role
Look at me i am a man
Look away i am a boy
Its hard to ignore
The dirt your models have left
Now i got to handle the debt
Now i gotta pay for the set
Lord forgive me im drinking regret
Lord forgive me i need to forget
Dreams are leaking is making me sad
Means delusion is creeping my back
Spider spider crawling my neck
Spider spider gimme a sec
Liar liar where is the spider
Close your eyes

But maybe this aint how it gotta be
Maybe im losing morality
Fuck it im done with formalities
This time i aint being the casualty
Euthanize my own mind
Fucking puppet i aint blue prints
For your next fucking nice true shit
Doubt creeps these grapevines
Now the rose blooms in my mind
Now another great fucking love dies
I will worship this lifeline
I am yours and you are not mine
Fucking pride got my damn name
In a damn honour bound mind game
Played by the fucking cold shame
Disappointment to my first name
Im ruled by a damn nother
Take my clothes i got honour take my food i got honour take my mind i got honour
Take my life thank you mother