Closure

You know
A lot of people always ask me why I'm so happy
The truth is it's a lie
You see

I cry myself to sleep
Every single fucking night
And when I'm looking in the mirror
I just really want to die
You see I hate the man
Who's always staring right back at me
He sees through all the pointless bullshit
I pretend to believe
I'm being introspective
Looking inside of my self
I'm seeing the reality
That I am inside of hell
I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to go
The only thing I really know
Is that I really can't let go
I've been hurt
Way too much
I've been stabbed in the back
I've been beaten
I've been bruised
Matter of fact
I still hate my fucking ex
Man I wish that bitch where dead
She left me all alone
With way too much fucking debt
Was this my fault
Was this her fault
Where did I even go wrong
I can't believe I got to say this shit
In another fucking song
I wrote a suicide letter on my phone
Like Mark said
Please tell my mom this is not her fault

Yeah I've done some pretty fucked up things in my life
It's a shame none of ya'll asked why I did them
Haha
I'll just tell you

I know I got a past that I really do regret
And yeah I lied about addictions that I never had
You see I did it for a friend
Who would otherwise be dead
Sitting there strung out in my fucking basement
He said he didn't give a shit
That he was going to end his life
That he was going to overdose
And end his shit that fucking night
But five years later
Manny's still staying clean
Not a drop of fucking heroine
In his bloodstream
Damn I'm tired of you motherfuckers
Talking shit on me
You've got
No idea where I've been
Or even what I've seen
You got your eyes closed
Loosing no sleep judging me
While I'm watching my friends die
Every fucking week
It's like
One two three four
There goes another one
Five six seven eight
Nine funerals in a month
Ten reasons why
You should open your eyes
But you don't care to see
You'd rather watch the world burn and die

I'm tired of always feeling like I'm the bad guy
Every single time I try and do something right
It's always got to go and blow up in my face
I'm always feeling like I'm the biggest disgrace
I wont give up
I wont back down
You best believe I'm stronger now
I've seen the light
I'll do it right
Darkness taught me how to fight
Swear to God I'm making good on my sins for sure
'Cause in the end I know that I'm going to get
Closure

Don't wake them up
They refuse to see
Don't wake them up
Don't wake them up
Yeah they're dead to me
Don't wake them up
They refuse to see
Don't wake them up
Don't wake them up
Yeah they're dead to me
Don't wake them up
They refuse to see
Don't wake them up
Don't wake them up
Yeah they're dead to me
Don't wake them up
They refuse to see
Don't wake them up
Don't wake them up
Yeah they're dead to me