Disillusion

I had a dream
You were
Standing
Next to me

Said that we
Should stop on
Talking, so I have
To let her be

I said, I had a
Dream, you
Were standing
Next to me

Guess she really
Fucking meant
That, now she is
Not texting me

Never thought
It'd come to
This, refused to
Change her pattern

Tried to give her
Fucking Mars
But she was busy
Stuck on Saturn

Everything you said
Did it really
Ever matter

Hit me in the
Chest, and now
I feel it in
My bladder

Guess she
Wasn't ready
For a bonafide OG

Never thought
That you would
Waste your time
With little old me

I must thank you
For the memories
To you they're
Maybe nothing

But to me, an
Over thinker, I
Believed that they
Were something

Guess you couldn't
Be alone, and
You could never
Beat that obstacle

Every fucking
Reason that
You saying
So illogical

Play with my
Emotions, said
You cared, oh
Was that true

But you said I
Do not know
You, that shit hit
Me out the blue

What's the cure
For a heartbreak
All the answers
Say let go

But I'm weak, and
Did that once
Before, and now
I do not know

Can I tell you
Happy birthday
When it's closer
To that day

Think I've told her
Almost everything
There's nothing
Left to say

I had a dream
You were standing
Next to me

Said that we
Should stop on
Talking, so I have
To let her be

I said, I had a
Dream, you
Were standing
Next to me

Guess she really
Fucking meant
That, now she is
Not texting me

Told me to
Let go, not
For her, but
For myself

Are you really
One to give
Advice, and try
To give me help

Can you really
Tell me what
To do, when you
Don't love yourself

Everybody says
He's toxic, guess
You don't care
For your health

That's what really
Breaks my heart
Because you run
Back, nothing changes

Oh you say you're
Trying to work it
Out, with feuds
And false exchanges

So he begged you
And he pleaded
He got down on
Both his knees

Sure that ain't
The first time
Ever, but you like
To help and please

Got your history
Of challenges
They're written
On your skin

Yet you fight
A losing battle
Because you're
Struggling within

Yes you're caring
You're compassionate
But that don't
Make you weak

It's the struggles
That I deal with
Everyday and
Every week

I don't know you
Think you're lying
Because you know
We're so alike

Guess he fills you
With that dopamine
And messes with
Your psych

If the cosmos
Were to speak
I think they'd say
It's all aligning

Because you know
That I'm for real
And I was never
One for lying

I had a dream
You were
Standing
Next to me

Said that we
Should stop on
Talking, so I have
To let her be

I said, I had a
Dream, you
Were standing
Next to me

Guess she really
Fucking meant
That, now she is
Not texting me