One of Us Cannot Be Wrong

I lit a thin green candle to make you jealous of me
Then the room just filled up with mosquitoes
When they heard that my body was free
Then I took the dust of a long sleepless night
And I put it in your little shoe
Then I confess that I tortured the dress
That you wore for the world to look through
Oh

I showed my heart to the doctor
He said I'd just have to quit
Then he wrote himself a prescription
Then your name was written in it
Then he locked himself in a library shelf
With the details of our honeymoon
Now I hear from the nurse, that he's doing much worse
And his practice has all in a ruin

Oh, I heard of a saint who had loved you
So I studied all night in his school
Where he taught that the duty of lovers
Is to tarnish the Golden Rule
Just when I was sure that his teachings were pure
He drowned himself in the pool
His body is gone but back here on the lawn
His spirit continues to drool

Oh, an Eskimo showed me that movie
He'd recently taken of you
Now the poor man could hardly stop shivering
His lips and his fingers were blue
I suppose that he froze when the wind took your clothes
And I guess he just never got warm
But you stand there so nice in your blizzard of ice
Oh, please let me back into your storm
Please

La da dah dah da da dah dah da da dah
La da dah dah da da dah dah da da dah
La da dah dah da da dah dah da da dah
La da dah dah da da dah dah da da dah
Aah
Aah