Anymore

Why don't we talk anymore
I know it's been too long
I've been waiting for you to call for years now
But you don't want me anymore
You don't want me anymore
I am tired of all these closed doors
When friends don't want me anymore

Lately I've been thinking about
Who would show up to my funeral if it was announced
I know you don't care anymore
But I still wonder if you would show up only to bounce
I been dealing with demons
I know I've got scars
Late at night, it's easy to think
That I might spiral down the rabbit hole with liquor
And pour myself a drink until the bottle is finished
I been taking way too long
Thinking on wrongs done to me and the wrongs I've done
Different countries, different seasons, different reasons
I struggle on what to feel when I'm left behind
I've been trying to figure out
How it all fell apart when I carry the weight
I been taking up the time doing things that I hate
I been trying to forget that you want nothing to do with me

Why don't we talk anymore
I know it's been too long
I've been waiting for you to call for years now
But you don't want me anymore
You don't want me anymore
I am tired of all these closed doors
When friends don't want me anymore

I'm always tryna fit the mess in my chest
Into the words in my brain, then into verses on the page
But it's not always best
Sometimes I can't find the rhyme to properly express
I can't find the line when I wanna confess
I'm just tryna find a benefit
To being obsessed over the people who've hurt me
I've been way too pressed
God I just can't let go
I've been way too blessed to not be at rest
But they got me all fucked up
Thinking on who left me because I wanna be enough
I been waiting on closure
From people who don't give it a single thought
My life has moved on, but the pressure in my lungs has not
And now I'm thinking I should reach out (one more time)
I been thinking I could save this (give it one more try)
I hate a gap I'm unable to build a bridge across
I keep looking from what I have back to what I've lost

Why don't we talk anymore
I know it's been too long
I've been waiting for you to call for years now
But you don't want me anymore
You don't want me anymore
I am tired of all these closed doors
When friends don't want me anymore

I get scared out of reaching out sometimes
I start to think if friends never really wanted me around
Did my hours in the basement mean enough
I tend to dig my own grave, but I can feel that it's a long way down
I don't wanna fall for past mistakes that someone else has made
I've seen the price that's paid
But am I bound to walk the same steps, fall the same ways
Can I say I'm finally on the same page
Walking in tune with everyone else around me
I just wanna repay what the world has bought me
Giving back my love to those who love me
Paying back the pain to those who've knocked me down
I'm trying to be better but I'm petty at heart
When it gets this big, my wounds are easier to pick apart
I been filling pages, but I can tell you this doesn't get any easier

Why don't we talk anymore
I know it's been too long
I've been waiting for you to call for years now
But you don't want me anymore
You don't want me anymore
I am tired of all these closed doors
When friends don't want me anymore

I hope friends I haven't called in a while
Still remember we would kick it
Hope that makes you smile
I been tryna find the nerve to hit you up on my cell
But I can't stop waiting for history to repeat itself
I been waiting on a lot of dead dreams
I been sowing up a lot of split seams
My head's relentless when I'm tryna reach out
I been tryna figure out what my fear is about
I been tryna figure out if the distance is too much to cross
I just wanna figure it out so I avoid the cost
Are they bonds in my head
Are they thoughts in my bed
I can't keep up with the things I think I've said
Is the feeling wasted
Is the problem real
I wanna get over myself
I been waiting to figure out how I feel
I got enough to worry for it all
In the coffin waiting for the nail to fall

I'm still waiting for you to call
I'm still waiting for you to call



Credits
Writer(s): Alvin Halimwidjaya
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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