Two Steps Back

I know that I'm better off
To not think about what I lost
Make my old self proud
Trying to stay strong
But I can't avoid what I see in my sleep
Thought you were gone for good
I was one step to a better livelihood
Now I'm two steps back
I misunderstood
Didn't think that love could scar me so deep

Really thought I was doing well for awhile
I was starting to get used to all the miles and miles
Came across an old pic
And I saw that smile
And I
I lost my grip
I lost my shit
Somewhere along the way
I failed
Yeah, I gave in
My heart's a rollercoaster
I'd just like some closure

Yeah!
I try to find the answers
But you make it really hard to stay sober
And you don't even notice

I know that I'm better off
To not think about what I lost
Make my old self proud
Trying to stay strong
But I can't avoid what I see in my sleep
Thought you were gone for good
I was one step to a better livelihood
Now I'm two steps back
I misunderstood
Didn't think that love could scar me so deep

Cause you taunt me, taunt me
Like you know
Now you haunt me, haunt me
Like a ghost
Are you from the grave?
That explains the way
You somehow
Chase me in my dreams

Stay the fuck out my brain
Drugs make me insane
Make me feel like Cobain
Think I need to switch lanes
I don't feel real
But I'm in my feels still
Devil tryna make a deal
But I don't have a soul to steal

Wish I didn't have a heart to kill
All I want to do is heal
Yeah, but I'm falling again
Yes, I'm stalling my friend
As I crawl to my end
I can't get up
Cause all I do is sin

I know that I'm better off
To not think about what I lost
Make my old self proud
Trying to stay strong
But I can't avoid what I see in my sleep
Thought you were gone for good
I was one step to a better livelihood
Now I'm two steps back
I misunderstood
Didn't think that love could scar me so deep