Not Suicidal

Ever think about blowing your brains out
Load a clip and aim it to your dome
Let it rain out
Not suicidal
It's just something that I think about
Right when I'm alone and my thoughts won't let me seek help

I'm racing demons and I'm driving with no seat belt
Looking for a Tonka truck to hit me on a speed bump
Not thinking these thoughts on purpose
They just happen to surface like dark clouds on the horizon
And they're rising and I don't know if I'm falling or I'm climbing
But I'm looking for a way out
Blast the Mather's LP and just let it play out
Keep reminding yourself, there's people that you care about
They really gon be mad if they find out it's a mask
Put a smile on and be glad, make jokes make em laugh
Laugh along, now you're the man
Then sit alone and make a plan
Make a plan
Make a plan

Ever think about blowing your brains out
Load a clip and aim it to your dome
Let it rain out
Not suicidal
It's just something that I think about
Right when I'm alone and my thoughts won't let me seek help

Not doing this on purpose
The silence is gettin nervous
Let's find a plan to escape it
Should I take my mouth and tape it
Can't swim, but I can fake it
Make a cop lose his patience
It's not that hard, dare I say it
Protect and serve is just a saying
And I can say it again, would that make me your friend
Would you answer a call an innocent in distress
Would it be a man who needs help or would you offend
Either way a life would end
Wouldn't need a will, got nothing to my name
I think about when I'm gone, who would be to blame
Would you look back at this song and feel ashamed
Would you think about my eyes and see the pain
See me drowning in the lies I need to tell to stay alive so I can
Breathe again!

Ever think about blowing your brains out
Load a clip and aim it to your dome
Let it rain out
Not suicidal
It's just something that I think about
Right when I'm alone and my thoughts won't let me seek help

Not doing this on purpose it feels like the walls are closing
Drowning in all the emotion, all the colors dull & frozen
That's what depression feels like
It's really not on purpose but it never really feels right
Wake up every morning get hit with a steel pipe
Sun gets cut in half and you're planning out your last night
Last night, we were laughing smoking, puff, pass right
Thinking bout a past life, you get another chance right
Come back and do it mad nice
Happy thoughts, no more strife
Warm smiles
Strawberry skies
Chocolate flies
A calm life
Could be all mine look I see a sharp knife
Maybe it's a sign, die young & live fast right

Ever think about blowing your brains out