Parody (feat. Retro Boi)

I texted her eight times
She didn't reply - nine times
She said a quick "hi" - ten times
She told me goodbye - I got high
She listens to grunge, like Nirvana
She thinks my music is a joke
She loves new wave, like the Cure
She listens to me - never
I guess I could be cool, like Robert Smith
Paint my face with red lipstick
Wear black jeans, smoke cigarettes
Play guitar and sing to vent

I'm a parody. I'm sad
I'm a hoax, and life's a drag
She thinks so low of me
I'm a parody and she's lovely
I'm a parody. I'm sad
I'm a hoax, and life's a drag
She thinks so low of me
I'm a parody and she's lovely

I masturbated eight times
She never replied - nine times
I looked at nudes - ten times
In my bedroom, then got high
I listen to trap, like Peep
She thinks that genre is a joke
I dig pop-punk, like Blink
I'll wait for her - while I drink
I try to write songs, like Tom DeLonge
Sing angsty words for sing-alongs
I tell foul jokes on the internet
And cry while she plays hard to get

I'm a parody. I'm sad
I'm a hoax, and life's a drag
She thinks so low of me
I'm a parody and she's lovely
I'm a parody. I'm sad
I'm a hoax, and life's a drag
She thinks so low of me
I'm a parody and she's lovely

You go out - I stay in
I'll drive a van off the Brooklyn bridge
While you're out - with him
You'll feel so fucking dead to me
Then I'll drown in my doubt
I'll sink into the bottom now
Of this mess - that I made
I'll be so fucking dead to you

I'm a hoax and life's a drag
Eating Whataburger fries out the bag
And it's cold in my car - so I hopped on the track
While you hang with your friends
And your new handbag
Guess I never got the invite
But I've been thinking 'bout you all night
You're probably with him sipping fine wine
Oh - and I'll be standing on the sidelines
Oh - but it's nothin' new
I'm steady sittin' with my shadow in the game for two
I guess I really need to find some other things to do
Instead of writin' music that you'll never listen to
And that's all on me
Imma sit here with my buddies drinkin' Dr. P
I can't believe I really thought that you would fall for me
You watch me bleed like a parody

I'm tired and I'm faded - my life feels overrated
I think so low of me - I'll sleep - for an eternity
I'm an asshole who's wasted in a bar feeling sedated
About to piss myself while she's with someone else

I'm a parody. I'm sad
I'm a hoax, and life's a drag
She thinks so low of me
I'm a parody and she's lovely
I'm a parody. I'm sad
I'm a hoax, and life's a drag
She thinks so low of me
I'm a parody and she's lovely