Drunk on Loneliness

This feeling of anxiety
Is constantly inside of me
This overwhelming feeling that
No one will wanna confide in me
I really wish
I didn't do
This to myself
I don't wanna do this to my health

I just can't do shit right
I feel like I can't breathe
Every time I see others
I worry if they'll leave
Trust is such a concept
I cannot even understand
A card has two sides
So does a helping hand

I find refuge in blocking good things in my life
Because this way
When I lose it
I'll be the one to hold the knife
Not another person
I won't let it be an option
I'm drunk on this idea
That loneliness is antitoxin

If I ever do leave my house
Small talk is always the best disguise
As when my heart starts racing
This is what my anxiety hides behind
How do you run from worries you create?
It's like playing chess
And getting checkmate
With yourself
With yourself

I'm not a role model
This isn't what I strive to be
Yet somehow certain people
For some reason look up to me
All I want is for one person to care
And when I think I've found someone
They never seem to be there

I find refuge in blocking good things in my life
Because this way
When I lose it
I'll be the one to hold the knife
Not another person
I won't let it be an option
I'm drunk on this idea
That loneliness is antitoxin

Maybe it's me
Maybe I'm the issue
But when I don't leave my house
I never get "I miss you"
I push people away as a test of their loyalty
But no one ever notices
They never care for me

I try my best to make the most of my time
But no one wants to go out with me and talk over some wine
I seem to constantly
Put myself in solitude
Because I'm not nice enough
For anyone to pursue

I find refuge in blocking good things in my life
Because this way
When I lose it
I'll be the one to hold the knife
Not another person
I won't let it be an option
I'm drunk on this idea
That loneliness is antitoxin
Antitoxin

Every time I'm around another person
I feel claustrophobic
Maybe that's a sign I'm
Anthropophobic
Anthropophobic
Anthropophobic
Anthropophobic



Credits
Writer(s): Jessica Dean
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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