Feelings

Feelings
I found myself in a place of sorrow
I found myself in a place of grief
And at first I didn't have a language for it
All I knew something was off

And I couldn't trace it back to any missstep I took
I couldn't trace it back to anything that I have done
That was like a cosquence
I was just, my emotions were just

I had feelings, I was feeling a lot
Um, my lyric was pandemics of something I never even knew could happen
Or whether it was relational stuff that was just not working out
Friends just not ending, friendship not ending well
Or it was just my own personal brokeness
Inertenal, inner, internal battle

I just had feelings, still have feelings
And what I realize is that
There is a place and feelings where you can honour the Lord
Where I can have these feelings
And He is not in heaven like, "Hey, Get out of there"
"Get out of those feelings, don't feel that"

He is not rushing me to get to a place that I am not
But He is not just in heaven but
He is sitting with me in it
In my tears, in my confusion, in my frustration, in my questions
He is sitting here, present with me and
I have realized and I have learned something about Him

In my feelings that I may have not learned in the Spirit perse
I have learned something about Him being the God of my emotions
The one who created me
And I may not have learned, had I not been in this place
I've learned how to suffer with Him

I think a lot of times
Before in my life, I've slipped into depression easier
And slipped into a worldly grief easier
Because I've tried to suffer without Him
But I've learned how to suffer with Him
Through this process I haven't been able to pray like I used to

I've learned how to suffer with Him
In fellowship join Him in the fellowship of his suffering
And that's what this album is, that's what these song's are
My process of lement
My process of suffering with Him
Being able to feel my feelings but not lean on them
Father I thank you for allowing me to have feelings