Not Fine

I should be living my life
Happily young and carefree
I should be living my life
Happily young and carefree
My true love is waiting
And concentrating mainly on me
Days are for giving
And life is worth living
And that's how it should be
But that's not life, for me

I'm not fine

Time's was hard on the boulevard
Peers busting through the wall
I'm jealous, How you pull it off?
Who am I?
Who are ya'll?
I need time to skew it on the barbecue
Talk about a consequence
That's why I'm not involved with you
A hard spot to be in
Heart locked, I got 3 in
A good man to ya'll
A bad uncle to baby Ian
So, what's the reason?
I block son cuz I'm deflecting
Can't make face time
A constant state of reconnecting
I don't, wanna be legend
Cuz we grow up & out
I need room to be a mess
So let me clean up my house
And cuz I do it in your face
Don't mean I won't check your mouth
Now, let this be a lesson
On how to shimmy through the doubt
It's really shitty having found
All your demons at a round table
Having table talks on how to keep you in the ground
City city boy sounds
Stoop kid afraid to leave his stoop
Not afraid to stoop so low
That he sees the truth
If not me then tell me who's supposed to do it?
Who's the one that I can call on
When the fall off is approaching through
The cost of living is the cost of doing
And I'm so self involved
I can't hear you when you talking to me